Y’all, Josh is stating obvious things about me even though I told him today wasn’t a good day to stage a faux internet fight.
My caramel macchiato was decaf this morning. I should’ve prepared. I hadn’t taken him seriously. People so rarely do what they say they’re gonna do.
I’m shocked. I can’t believe I’ve been engaging in bloggy witty repartee with Josh all this time, and never even knew he was the kinda person who does what he says he will. Is no one unreliable anymore?
He told me he’d steal my words and I told him that would be plagiarism, and now he’s accusing me of being a neurotic bitch who said something nice about his wife. Okay, I did, but just that ONE time! Are people so sensitive that I can’t say one nice thing about their wives without it turning into a knock-out, drag out fight?
He’s threatened to bring the thunder, and he didn’t even offer any rain for my garden!
Annd, he called me a troll and said I was never a daisy.
Worst of all, some of it is in ALL CAPS, which we all know means he’s pushed the Caps Lock button.
I really don’t know what to do.
He’s not mad at me and keeps typing words of truth and tease.
Right now, he’s laughing and asking me if I think this is over.
I think he’s only doing this to impress Anxious Mom, since she wrote, “Oh please, you two must do a fake blog war. This would make my day. No, my week.”
— with like, really big smiley face emoticons and everything. That’s right, Anxious Mom, I will drag you down with me — you and your big, happy emoticons!
At this point, it seems I need to defend myself before Josh tells the teacher on me. Should I call him some names? Should I CAP at him? I should probably try to get all my friends to follow him now, but how many people should I drag into this with me?
How do you handle this kind of drama online?
Please advise.
(Right now, I gotta go over to Twitter and randomly @ people with the “You’re not a daisy” comment.)
He said you were “never a daisy”? Oh… It. Is. ON. 😉
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I know! Are you on my side? Do you have anything to protect me from the thunder?Are you going to promote this war? I need to know how much coffee to brew.
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I think I’ll be Switzerland in this one. But just a heads up… I’d brew lots and LOTS of exceptionally strong coffee. Josh can get pretty mean. 😉
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Neither one of you are daisies. In fact, I may piggyback on your blog war and make my own post, take you both down and make you cry tears of embarrassment.
Or I may eat pie.
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See, now that’s the kind of apathy I’m used to!
When you say embarrassment, it’s about my hair, isn’t it? I will drink water in preparation of tears.
YOU STARTED IT! You can’t have pie until it’s over.
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😀
My apple pie with cream was amazing. Free Pie Wednesday!
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PIE!
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Right? Who doesn’t want pie? Damn her and her pie-eating.
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Got to read that on his blog…. I was , like, whoa ! Then I thought, oh, a faux internet fight. * cough* I say, bring it. * cough *
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Oh dear, I can see this getting nasty already, hurtling insults around that you ‘were never a daisy’ is scraping the bottom of the barrel I am staying out of this one, you are both on your own!
I might however, not be able to control myself and chime in with the odd remark! 🙂
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I am definitely going to steal the “never a daisy” line because that is one of the greatest (yet lowest) things I have ever heard!
I usually try to stay out of arguments, so I’ll remain a passive observer for now!
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He plagiarized that line and I’m glad I’m not alone in re-plagiarizing it!
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Well since he plagiarized it, the best revenge is to get everyone saying it until it’s a common phrase! That way he can’t possibly try to claim credit for it!
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You know how men are, they think they invented the wheel! 😛
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First of all, I said “You’re no daisy.” I did not say “You were never a daisy!” Quit putting words into my mouth!!!!! Second, I’ll have you know I used the Shift key to type in all capital letters. Caps Lock is for lazy people!!!!! And what type of person has a decaf caramel macchiato? Seriously? You’re right, you should have prepared, because it’s on. And you’ve been served. And other mean sounding nonsense!
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If we’re going to get picky, then I never actually accused you of plagiarism, YOU MAN! I like Caps Lock! I have little hands and I didn’t take typing in high school because I was told smart girls don’t become secretaries! I’m am not lazy and you’re not, either!
People with anxiety disorder shouldn’t consume caffeine, Josh! And I don’t like sweets in the mornin! — Which again, you’d know if you read every post I every wrote!
I’ll leave it to Anxious Mom to put things in your mouth! (Because I guess she’s got pie. I dunno. SHE’s lazy. She didn’t even mention what kinda pie!)
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Hahahaha! You didn’t come right out and say it, but you threatened it. And yes, we shouldn’t, but I do anyway. Got a problem with that? And if you don’t like sweets, what do you call the caramel? LIAR!!! And girls shouldn’t type (were you really told that, awful!) because only dumb secretaries like of State are girls. And no, I haven’t read every single post of your feminist propaganda! (Maybe because I haven’t gotten to them all.) But I’ve read enough to know that you and Anxious Mom picked the wrong person to troll. I’ve done time in Reddit. I’ve heard of 4chan. You think you know what a troll is? You know nothin’, woman.
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I know that you’re not a coffeephile or you’d know that caramel macchiatos are not sweet!
Yes I really was told that! I was also told we didn’t need home ec because we were all supposed to be president, an astronaut, a race car driver, doctor, lawyer — that we smart girls needed extra college prep and so I took geometry, genetics, and TA in French instead! You wouldn’t know that, because I haven’t even written it in every post I every wrote! The Secretary of State probably has several secretaries, YOU MAN!
I truly don’t know what you’re going on about in terms of accusation, but I will flip it on you and accuse you instead! HAH! I hope your caffeine gives you enough adrenaline to get through the day without a nap! HAH!
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I do know that a properly made caramel macchiato is not sweet. I was a barista before, which you would know if you read my posts! However, caramel is still a sweet that you had in the morning. HA! And the Secretary of State was a woman recently but you wouldn’t know that because you think typing is unimportant and for stupid girls only (or someone told you that). So HA! And I don’t know either, but there is nothing like holding up a mirror to the petty, childishness that has recently been the talk of WP so I blame you! HA!
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Dammit Josh, I was a barista, too, which you’d know if you read every post I have every written! I really do prefer iced white mochas, but it was chilly this morning, and they were out of oatmeal raisin cookies, probably because they don’t understand the needs of smart, bad feminist housewives.
Did you just call me petty and childish? Gah, it’s exhausting to take everything out of context, and to be mean — How do people have the energy to troll?
I don’t even know who was fighting, because the rock I live under is so fabulously enormous. I bet my rock is bigger than your rock!
I feel like I could insult you better if I didn’t like you. IT’S JUST LIKE YOU TO START A WAR WITHOUT GIVING ME ANY AMMUNITION!
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Okay, serious here…I honestly don’t know how you avoided the reblogs from everyone of the two parties for the last few months that somewhat exploded yesterday. I was hoping my little parodied image of one of the people’s little logos would let everyone know, but I guess you are lucky enough to have a bigger rock. Oh well, this was a lot of fun, even if it the point is lost. Oh, and an oatmeal raisin cookie in the morning, That’s a sweet!!!!! HA!
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You think that’s a sweet? What’re you, a turtle? Don’t turn this into a battle of who consumes more sugar, because I WILL FUCKING WIN!
I seldom read re-blogs. I seldom re-blog. One day we’ll get some coffee and you can tell me all about it. But they’d better have my cookie on that day, or you’ll bring the thunder, right?!? Right?!?!
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I will, and Hell’s coming with me. (If I can get Hell out of the house, she’s so shy these days. Oh, I think my next pet will have to be named Hell now!) And I usually do not read reblogs either, but when they are so childish, curiosity occasionally gets the better of me., And are you trying to say you consume more sugar than me, or vice versa, because I can tell you I’m a straight up sugar addict!
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Okay, I’m not a sugar addict. But I do love certain sweets, and I prefer sweet drinks fersure.
I wouldn’t classify oatmeal raisin cookies as sweets, tho. Oatmeal is breakfast food…
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Yes, but the brown sugar, regular sugar, and raisins qualifies them as sweet. My favorite cookie, btw. Except maybe Girl Scout Samoas. Tough one there. I also consume my sugar in the form of drinks. Lemonade, REAL sugar Pepsi and Coke and other real sugar sodas and of course my coffee are where I get my sugar from. I think we need to turn on Anxious Mom. We can be like the US and the USSR against Germany. A war on two fronts. We’ll put our differences aside for now, and attack her. Sound good? 🙂
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Lol no it does not sound good. I hate to be the party pooper, but…I’m a pacifist, and I like Anxious Mom, and I’m truly tired! I told you today wasn’t a good day for me! Wednesdays are hard on me. (Which you’d know if you read every post I’ve every written!)
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Hahahaha! Well, I appreciate you playing a long anyway, because it was a great time. I like Anxious Mom too.
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🙂 Just this once, tho, yeah?
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I think we did a great job and made our point about the pettiness. It was fun, I laughed way too hard. But we all know I love your blog, and that is that.
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I love your blog, too 😀
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I just want to remind yall that I associate flowers with lady parts due to my upbringing. So everytime it is said that Joey is or isn’t a daisy, my brain is going to a bad place 😄
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Err…but…NO
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You said those were petunias! There were daisies, too?! WTF?
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Heehee just petunias but I’m letting it work for all flowers now! So don’t call yourself a flower name around me, or else.
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Gypsophila. Geranium. Bougainvillea. Agapanthus. I’m really juvenile 🙂
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Haha
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LOL, that is awful!
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This war has made my day. Definitely needed the entertainment. I think ear buds are necessary for protecting you from the thunder. Play whatever music you like, especially if it is a feminist! Alanis Morrisette comes to mind, but I’m sure there are others. Forget the daisy, be a sunflower, they are tall and strong and have seeds you can throw at Josh. But I’m not going to comment anymore, I need to find some pie!
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LOL 😀 Thanks for the support!
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Just popped over here from Josh’s blog. Not sure who I should root for in this fake war!
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I should think it would be obvious that I am the victim here!
Thanks for stopping by to comment 🙂
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Why can’t we all just get along??
Or as Raqi once said when discussing the possibility of Osama Bin Laden coming to attack her family, “I’m gonna hit him with my bunny!” Take that, Josh, you troll-basher bully.
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LOL! Raqi wins! 😀
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Score 1 for neurotic bitches ‘n bunnies 😍
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High five!
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I just want to remind yall that I associate flowers with lady parts due to my upbringing. So everytime it is said that Joey is or isn’t a daisy, my brain is going to a bad place 😄
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What, he used CAPS?! Oh it is on — that extra finger effort to press the cap lock is just beyond the pale. I’m amazed that you’re coping so well under such vicious onslaught…
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Made my week too. You guys rock. Thanks for the laughs!!
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I was getting worried until I realised it was a joke. How silly am I, and relieved of course 🙂
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Just so you know : men DID invent the wheel . Just saying.
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How dare you state the obvious! 😛
Thanks for commenting, Dan 🙂
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