Effortless

Posted on January 11, 2016 by joey

Today’s Just Jot it January prompt is effortless, which I’m happy to say, actually is. (Thanks for the great prompt, Dan!)

I grew up among three industrious parents and between them, I was subjected to a large menu of their effortless abilities. Which means, I suppose by default, I can do a lot of things with minimal effort.
I really do try to keep this blog under 1000 words, so I tried to devise a list of things none of my parents can do…and I think they’d all agree, none of them can leap tall buildings in a single bound…or maybe they do, and they just don’t tell me about it because there’s math involved.

I present to you the list of things I do effortlessly:

1. Write.
For me, writing is easier than speaking and I speak well with some effort. I feel good when I write.
Speaking is letting people look at me and being expected to respond appropriately and instead saying something awkward and incoherent while making bizarre faces at them.
I should clarify, that’s how I feel.
I write this like I’m some sorta bumbling social idiot, which I am not, having taught, having worked a great deal with the public, having been on the speech team and in debates, having never been marked “Needs to participate more in class” on my report cards. I can talk to anyone, anywhere, but I’d rather not. It’s excruciating and exhausting. I’d much rather write.

2. Worry.
If worrying bore weight, I would need a crane to hold my head up.
Present to me the most benign settings and I will point out to you all the things about which you should be worried.
The world is filled with danger.
My heart is on my sleeve and in my throat and made of glass. From bits of control, I fashion extensive fortresses of protection so that people can come at me like a wrecking ball.

3. Cook.
If I can taste it, I can cook it. Some people can play by ear, I can cook by mouth.
Now and again, I don’t know if it’s yogurt or sour cream, or if it’s cardamom or ginger and cinnamon, but unless it’s baking, I usually don’t need a recipe to recreate it.

4. Art
I’m not saying I’m good at drawing, painting, etc, but I’m not bad at it, and it’s easy for me. Lemme doodle you a doodad.

doodle_dot

my mother must have a stack of these doodles…

5. Teach
If I understand it, I can teach it. Or, if I need a 6-week position as a middle school math teacher, I can learn it well enough to teach it. And maybe that one really smart kid will enjoy showing us how he got the answer to the bonus question, because X is Your Mom, Algebra.

There you have it, my five effortless abilities.

jjj-2016
Just Jot it January is brought to you by LindaGHill

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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52 Responses to Effortless

  1. Carrie Rubin says:
    January 11, 2016 at 12:11 PM

    All are wonderful things to excel at. Well, except for the worry. That’s no fun. Maybe you can excel at meditation and dispel some of it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. orbthefirst says:
    January 11, 2016 at 12:19 PM

    “Pretty trees tra-la-la!”

    Hahahaha!! You crack me up joey. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. coldhandboyack says:
    January 11, 2016 at 12:27 PM

    Love it. I’m another one who can talk to people, but prefer not to.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Timelesslady says:
    January 11, 2016 at 1:52 PM

    Loved your list. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Benson says:
    January 11, 2016 at 2:18 PM

    Nice list. Have you always been a worrier?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Judy Martin says:
    January 11, 2016 at 2:20 PM

    I am so envious of your list. Apart from worrying, which I am pretty damn good at myself. and not liking to talk much (however I am socially awkward). I can’t do any of the things you find so effortless. I love food and enjoy eating it, and can even cook, but only if I follow a recipe! I can’t draw to save my life, and I can only teach things that most people don’t want to know! I enjoyed reading this 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. vanbytheriver says:
    January 11, 2016 at 2:58 PM

    I enjoyed your list…it’s a plus to understand yourself so well. And the worrying thing will decrease with age a bit. I’m with you on the writing, cooking and teaching thing…so there’s that. Love the doodles…the artistic gene skipped a generation for me…but my kids are amazing !

    Fun post ! Thanks. ☺

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Fourth Generation Farmgirl says:
    January 11, 2016 at 3:06 PM

    I loved this post! “I can cook by mouth.” You’re hilarious! And, what’s the deal with cats and their bottoms, especially when you’re trying to relax with a nice cup of tea. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  9. LindaGHill says:
    January 11, 2016 at 4:57 PM

    That was easy to read. 😉
    Love the doodles. Mine suck, as you can see by my JusJoJan badge. 😛
    I nominate you to create the next one.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. meANXIETYme says:
    January 11, 2016 at 6:03 PM

    That was an awesome blog and a really fun doodle.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Dan Antion says:
    January 11, 2016 at 6:33 PM

    I thought that I read, liked and commented on this earlier – hmmm. I love the doodles. I wish it was harder for you to worry. Nice response!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. jan says:
    January 11, 2016 at 8:07 PM

    I’m very good at worrying! Should teach a class in it.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Anxious Mom says:
    January 11, 2016 at 10:06 PM

    Ha those doodles are cute! I vote more doodles on this blog B-)

    Liked by 1 person

  14. reocochran says:
    January 12, 2016 at 12:18 AM

    Joey, I will always remember when you spontaneously invited me to come by and eat. You are effortlessly nice, generous, caring and hysterically funny. You make me smile when I arrive and usually laugh, too.
    I believe in your coking, see your art which could go well on each chapter of your “How to Live Better” book or some such Joey advice book.
    I worry tons so I may need to borrow your proverbial crane! 😉 I will conclude in saying gotta hit the sack bur I loved that bath tub abd you in it. A quiet escape. Ahh!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. dalecooper57 says:
    January 12, 2016 at 3:54 AM

    I cook.
    I write.
    I talk. My goodness, do I talk. In fact I probably write because it enables me to tell all this rubbish to people who I don’t know and can’t talk to.
    A can’t art.
    I rarely worry.

    You probably didn’t need to know all that, but just because I can’t talk to you doesn’t mean you can escape, because I can write.

    Effortlessly.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Pistachios says:
    January 12, 2016 at 7:18 AM

    You also have nice handwriting. As a pharmacist, I appreciate nice handwriting 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Jewels says:
    January 12, 2016 at 9:35 AM

    I love this Joey! I can tell that writing is effortless for you, and I enjoy it very much! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Manja Mexi Movie says:
    January 12, 2016 at 10:01 AM

    😀 A mix between me and my mom and her cousin because she is the only one who knows how to draw in my family. All in all – lovely you.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Laura says:
    January 12, 2016 at 3:43 PM

    Wonderfully put. I wish I could handle everything in writing — it’s so much simpler than, well, real life drama and the pressure of dealing with people IN THE MOMENT. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Deb at The Front Door Project says:
    January 12, 2016 at 8:10 PM

    That’s an excellent list! Of course I’m sure you would like to dial down the worrying bit, but all things considered being able to write, cook, teach and create art effortlessly is pretty awesome. What would my list be?? Vacation planning, photography, procrastination, accessorizing, decorating…

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      January 12, 2016 at 9:19 PM

      Nice. I wish I was better at accessorizing…I’ve got the basics, but I think my wardrobe most lacks accessories, and when I attend events, I feel it!
      Your photos are spectacular. I love how you always seem to get just the right balance between the subjects and their surroundings.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Deb at The Front Door Project says:
        January 13, 2016 at 11:01 AM

        What a nice compliment, Joey! Photography has really become a passion of mine over the last couple of years. As far as accessorizing – I’m lucky to have a teenage daughter to borrow from, too! Next time you hit Target or TJ Maxx or the like snap up a couple things 🙂 luckily accessories don’t have to be expensive to look good! Unless of course you have $ to burn!

        Liked by 1 person

  21. April says:
    January 14, 2016 at 11:12 AM

    I like that you find writing as something that is effortless to you. You make me laugh with every post. Well, at least chuckle 😀

    Liked by 1 person

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