The first thing I think of? Granny eggs. Granny eggs are what my family calls over easy eggs. I don’t know when this started, but it was before I became a Mottern. I assume a child, perhaps my husband or his sister, gave the eggs this moniker and it stuck.
So sure, I make Granny eggs like Granny does at her house, best done in a cast iron skillet, in leftover bacon grease.
— It’s important to teach your children the actual names of things. Fun with language is fabulous, but when your child asks the lunch lady for Granny eggs, well —
We’re not the only ones. Friends of mine call them lacy eggs, because the edges curl up like lace. I wonder what other names people have for eggs over easy?
All of my adult life, I’ve made eggs over easy. Many brunches, many family breakfasts, many breakfasts for dinner. Then one day, because he hates me as all children hate their parents, the boy one says to me, “I wish you made eggs where the orange stuff doesn’t move.” Fine enough. I cooked his yolk through, and while I did, I complained to Drew, “Been eatin these eggs his whole life and now he wants different eggs. Such a difficult child.”
Then, if you can imagine, this woman, this sister-in-law, this friend I’d cooked eggs for longer than I’d cooked eggs for Bubba says, “Actually, I prefer them cooked through as well. I don’t like runny centers.”
CAN WE NOT HAVE AN HONEST DIALOGUE ABOUT EGGS?!? DOES GRANNY KNOW ABOUT THIS?!?
“Well I love you and I want you to be happy. I will cook your eggs through, too.”
Such a difficult friend.
DO YOU STILL LIKE CREAM IN YOUR COFFEE OR IS THAT A LIE, TOO?!?
“Coffee Darlin?”
Apparently, there are gobs of people who like their eggs cooked through. I know, I was also shocked. I guess not everyone loves chasing runny yolk around a plate. Prolly a buncha those crazy people who don’t want their food to touch…
It turns out, almost everyone likes things a certain way, and this may not agree with your own preferences. The world is a cruel place where some people might find your coffee too strong. Your loved ones prefer sunny side up eggs, scrambled eggs, and Granny eggs, even though you yourself prefer poached eggs.
poached eggs & toast
As time passes, they ask you for chewier bacon, burnt bacon, or just the fatty, rubbery bits of the bacon, even though you don’t really like bacon, and would rather have sausage. Get to know people well enough and soon they feel entitled to fuck with the settings on your toaster and they put way too much syrup on their pancakes.
Eggs are only the beginning.
This SoCS post on eggs was brought to you by LindaGHill
How do you like your eggs? bacon? toast? coffee?
joeyfullystated 
I like pretty much anything that has to do with eggs, bacon, toast, and coffee. (But I prefer a runny yolk.)
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Mmmhmmm!
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Or you get old and can’t eat runny eggs – or any eggs – anymore and bitterly resent the egg eaters all around you. But seriously, I think sometimes we go along with whatever our version of “Granny eggs” is because we want to be part of the tribe but then better sense takes over and we want what we like not what everyone else likes. A funny, true post, Joey.
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Thank you 🙂 I’m glad you understood my big picture!
Sorry about your egg deprivation.
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Runny eggs. YES.
Bacon fat. YES.
Fatty parts of bacon (or any meat, basically.) YES.
I hear ya though as my grandfather likes lutefisk and because of that we all have no choice but to be brutally honest about foods we wont eat. 😛
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I can see the revulsion and revolution where lutefisk is involved. It’s not for everyone.
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If one of my kids says they want something different, another kids will say..”This isn’t F****ing Denny’s you know!”. LOL
But, that is why my stove has four burners, and four small egg pans, and four different types of plates. Maybe that is why I became a Mom, to learn how to cook.
That toaster problem happens in my kitchen too. Leave my stuff alone! 🙂
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Haha! I’m no short order cook! Now the kids are all old enough that if they don’t like the eggs I’m makin, they can make their own. WHICH IS WHY THEY MAKE CEREAL AND TOAST! Ahahaha! Only another mom could understand 😉
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LOL..that is why we have four different boxes of that too!
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You know it! 😛
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HaHA! I am one of those fussy people! Now I eat almost anything and love my food, but I get a bit funny with eggs, I do like the yolk runny, but as that normally means that there is a load of snotty egg white too, then I just ask for it all to be cooked through!
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Ew on the snotty whites!
Of course you’re fussy! We’re almost all of us fussy, but only compared to those who don’t fuss the same 😉
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HA! Yes, that is true! 🙂
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Those eggs look divine! Weekends are for big breakfasts in our family. I love my eggs sunny side up, bacon (doesn’t matter if chewy or crispy), toast, and a good cup of coffee! So good! 😄
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😀
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it’s a breakfast rebellion! I like mine sunny side up and sometimes over easy and other times scrambled…..
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I do dig on scrambled eggs now and again 🙂
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I like them scrambled soft and my husband likes them scrambled hard.
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I’m with you! Soft and fluffy all the way!
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Yay!
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Eggs soft-boiled, 5 minutes; bacon crispy; toast slightly brown with peanut butter and jelly; coffee with stevia and lactose-free milk. Once in a while (this morning), I have a piece of chocolate cake too.
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Written like a woman who knows what she wants. 🙂 Very well, thanks!
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I so don’t find it funny with anyone tampering with my toaster urrgh! I have two sides in my house, those who want runny and done through. We humans can be finicky at times 🙂
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Granny eggs sound wonderful. I like my eggs over easy, or hard boiled, or scrambled, with bacon or ham (if I have them) and some kind of breakfast pastry. Lately, I find I prefer omelets with mushrooms, cheese and either bacon or ham (again, if I have them). But then, my kids are grown and gone and I can make my eggs any way I wish. It was a different story when everyone was home – one wanted sunnyside up, another wanted scrambled, one wouldn’t eat eggs at all. And yes, eggs were just the beginning – there was the kid who would only eat alfredo noodles, and the kid who refused to eat meat, and the kid who refused any meals that didn’t have meat. All just part of being a family.
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That is just how it is with a family, yes.
I make poached eggs and toast for my lunch pretty often. (When I’m alone and can delight in only cooking my own eggs!) Thanks for sharing your egg preferences, an omelette is nice at times as well — The Mister is a big fan of omelettes, too.
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Another great post. It made me laugh. I love eggs but I prefer a runny yolk. Poached are first followed by granny eggs. I don’t recall eating too many eggs as a kid. I do remember Dad having his Sunday eggs over hard;and covered with ketchup. I guess the yellow offended him so much he had to burn it and then disguise it before he could eat breakfast. What I don’t get is for all those folks that don’t like runny yolk what do they do with their toast? Have you ever tried a 64 degree egg? To me they are the heaven in a shell.
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Thanks — I’m glad you laughed. Covered in ketchup, eh? No thanks. Bleck!
I don’t know what they do with their toast. Coat it with jam, mayhaps? Not much pleases me more than some runny yolk and toast. Mmm, mmm, Mmhm!
I have not had a 64 degree egg, but I have seen them on the occasional cooking show. I will try one when I can.
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I keep thinking about trying to do some in my slow cooker. Golly I have become so friggin’ lazy.
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LOL Oh boy! Just do it, you know you wanna! It’s so satisfying, cookin up somethin good! 😛
I just took brownies out the oven, dressed my tater salad, got chicken and bacon fryin on my stove — if I can do all that, you can put some eggs in yer slow cooker!!!
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Boy way to shame the old guy
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😉
Let me know how they turn out!
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Oh I will. But…I have to run some tests on the cooker to see how long I can maintain an accurate 148 degrees F on the cooker. Which I will do after I finish my bacon and my spice cake and the pasta salad. You are such a cutie.
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Oh spice cake, nom! 😛 Thank you, Benson 🙂
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On a side note Aldi has bacon,butter and cream on sale. Of course I am sure you already knew that.
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I did NOT know that. And here I bought all that stuff there last week. *sigh*
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Well the bacon is on the thin side but crisps up nicely. It is $1.74 per pound, limit 4, and it freezes;as does butter. The extra butter I got prompted me to make the spice cake,for the butter cream I put on top.
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I do like their bacon well enough. I’m going to go and get some to freeze — I hope they still have some when I get there!
Buttercream on spice cake, oh my! 😛
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Our kids were always picky, but I was willing to accommodate them as long as they were eating good stuff. Then they grew up and left, and CHARLIE got picky. Yes, he likes his yolks well done. So I got picky, and I like my Ramen unbroken, while he likes his all broken up before he cooks it. Also his spaghetti. I’m like, “Let’s cook it unbroken. It’s easier to cut yours up in your bowl than for me to tie mine together.”
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Hah! Truer words were never spoken about spaghetti, Marian! 🙂
I like my Ramen unbroken as well!
The Mister is picky about a few things — he likes everything overdressed and overgarlicked, but he’s a good egg all the same 😉
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Granny or hard-cooked?
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Granny, all the way 😉
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Eggs over easy, bacon crisp, toast rye, and coffee black and decaffeinated (blood pressure). I, too, prefer sausage over bacon.
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Excellent! Glad to have support in the sausage group! I’m decaf coffee, too! 🙂
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I don’t do eggs anymore (they make my stomach really unhappy), but back in the day I loved runny yolks. I loved what my mom used to call “eggs in the hole in the toast” which my MIL calls “toad in a hole”. Where you toast a piece of bread, make your egg, break a hole in the middle of the bread and finish the egg “over easy” in the pan IN THE TOAST HOLE. So the whites cook into the toast around the hole and the yolk finishes cooking (to over easy) in the hole. Then when you go to eat it, there’s the toast already surrounding the yolk to soak up the yumminess. 🙂
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OH YES. This is what I always cooked at brunch. But with cheese and garlic. Excellent egging. I’m sorry your tummy doesn’t love the eggies. How sad. I am happy to count you in the runny yolk group! 🙂
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The only way I like eggs is scrambled! But then I’m a fussy eater and I admit it!
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Runny.
Crispy.
Crunchy.
Black.
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I think my wife makes Granny Eggs. She would also prefer to do it in a cast iron skillet and with bacon grease. My mother tried to make eggs over easy but she broke them more often than she succeeded. I’ll eat just about any kind of egg, any kind of bacon any kind of toast and you cannot possibly put too much syrup on pancakes –
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Um, alright, half my house believes too much syrup is impossible as well BUT THEY ARE WRONG LIKE YOU. Haha! 🙂
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Not only do I agree with you about too much syrup, I don’t even particularly like syrup. I prefer pancakes or french toast with yogurt. Yeah, I know … a little odd.
… and bacon makes everything better.
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Great post! I’m with you on just about everything!
I’ve been known to conduct forensic tests on the toaster buttons to find out WHO TOUCHED THE TOASTER SETTINGS?!?
It’s Sunday morning, round brunch time here, might just go and cook me some runny eggs and toast 🙂
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Oh good! Enjoy! 😛
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Eggs over easy, bacon, rye toast, hash browns…the favorite. But if I scramble them, I like a side of sliced avocado and tomato with grilled pita bread. ☺ Coffee with heavy cream…a family indulgence, worth every calorie.
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Hash browns FTW! Oh I love hashbrowns! Love, love, love!
I have not had avocado with egg. I am intrigued. Just last week I tried avocado with chicken and black beans. I almost died of delicious. I don’t really like chicken much, but boy that was tasty!
Coffee with cream, absolutely 🙂
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Try avocado, with coarse salt and a few red pepper flakes with those eggs. You’ll be spoiled. ☺
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Mmm bacon…putting a pan of it in the oven past midnight wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, right?
Eggs? Nope, not for me. I will cook them though, the only way I know how — scrambled. All attempts at cooking them any different results in them ending up scrambled.
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I saw Dr. Phil episode where he said make one meal only. Me, nope. One pan has a sunny side up, the yolk better be runny but not broken before the child hits it with fork or tooth. The other eggs scrambled, take out half while still wet then cook half till dry. I always think it’s a simple thing. Cook the sunny side up first. If I fail it’s eaten by the scramble egg eaters
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I love a good poached egg on toast. I cure my own bacon, currently thinking about trying a bourbon maple bacon. I enjoy black coffee but occasionally will make Irish Cream for it.
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Bourbon anything is a hit with me! Thanks for comin by, Ron 🙂
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Wonderfully humorous post, and personally I’d love to have ‘granny’ style eggs as I’m terrible at cooking them 😉
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Ah, thank you 🙂
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I make what restaurants call, eggs in a basket. You take bread, you make a hole in the middle you grill it in butter and flip it, then you plant an egg in the middle. I used to have a griddle and made these for my own children and all the babysitting kids. the egg gets barely cooked as it has a wall of toasted, buttery bread around it. I flip it only once and serve it up and my Mom and Dad, who knows who made it up called these eggs, “Dipping Eggs.” since you can take the little center butter thingy and dip it into the uncooked or barely cooked eggs. Well, my kids have become omelet and scrambled eggs fanatics and they have barely a few times served these luscious eggs in a basket of buttery toasted/grilled bread to their kids. They look at me like I am crazy! My grandies won’t try them anymore. 😦 a family tradition gone by the wayside. I like crispy bacon, Joey. Smiles!
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I made a version of that for many years, but over time, only my husband asks for it anymore. Maybe I’ll surprise him and do that this weekend.
I’m sorry your tradition died out. We have plenty of that with this one or that as well. I tell ya, eggs are only the beginning. *hugs*
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Eggs scrambled please with buttered toast. Fruit of any kind is welcome on the side. Hot, freshly made coffee with cream and sugar is a must. Bacon is good on the weekends. 🙂
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Like my boiled eggs semi-hard, and my sunny-side-up and over-easy runny. Coffee with cream or milk, toast toasted, and bacon not too cooked. And oh, over-easy HAS to be cooked in bacon fat. Preferably over an open fire while camping. With a hangover.
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I love this post! Great metaphors or analogies. Maybe both?!!
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Both, thank so much 🙂
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