Change is Hard

Posted on May 27, 2016 by joey

Surely by now you’ve encountered a cashier who can’t make change? You know how it goes. Your bill is $17.55 and you hand over a twenty and a nickel and the cashier tries to give you back the nickel. You say you’d rather have two quarters and the cashier looks at you like you’re an idiot. When you suggest typing the amount tendered as $20.05, the cashier does this, “Ooookay” sorta thing and gives you $2.50 — and if the cashier is young enough, he may chortle out a “Haha!” as though you have performed magic.

Don’t even think about giving them coins once the machine says they need to give you change. They will freak out. What’re you, some kinda quick change artist?!? They’ll turn on their red blinking light! Alert! Alert!

It’s bizarre.
People can’t make change anymore. They can only do what the machine tells them.
I have been told there are many young adults who cannot count change at all. They tender paper money and trust they will be given correct change. They take their change to Coinstar and pay a machine to exchange it for something they find more useful.
Maybe this will be fine later. Like when those of us who can make change die off and there’s no one forcing them to cope with those perplexing shiny discs.

Since they can’t make change, they can’t count back change, either. No one counts back money anymore. “And seventy-five makes eighteen, nineteen, twenty.” If you don’t know what I’m talking about, why are you reading my blog? I can’t even with you.

I once worked at a bank. By the time I worked at the bank, I had six years of retail and cash handling experience. No one had to tell me to face the money all the same way. Honestly, I believe a parent taught me that before I ever started working. I think it was part of the Show Respect to Your Belongings Lecture Series.

Everywhere I ever worked kept the status quo of right-facing money.
Now? They may as well wad it up and throw it at me.

Apparently the new bill counters don’t need the money to be properly faced. But I do.

Many years ago, my husband and I were running a Girl Scout Cookie booth with our girls. Along came a lady customer, and it was then, only then, with over a decade of marriage behind us, I realized The Mister couldn’t count back money. So I said, “No, not like that, like this,” and started to show him. I mean, I’d taught all the girls…

Well that lady, that lady, ARGH! She said, “Huh uh, don’t do that. No. He’s a man.” She started QUOTING FUCKING SCRIPTURE (First Timothy) at me about a woman not having authority over a man.
I almost blacked-out with rage.
This is the kinda shit that happens to your heathen ass when you live in Georgia. While you stand seven inches from the sun.
I whatted the fuck outta that woman, while my husband stepped in front of me and tried to make nice and quick so the lady wouldn’t realize I was yelling “WHAT!!? WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?!? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!” I didn’t care that she was my elder, I was ready to beat the Jesus outta her.

Maybe my husband likes it when I tie his naked ass to a tree and teach him how to count back money, you don’t know!

authority

Change is hard.
Tolerance is harder.

Do you still properly face your money?

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
This entry was posted in Random Musings and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

53 Responses to Change is Hard

  1. mltrautz@yahoo.com says:
    May 27, 2016 at 9:49 AM

    Oh, that is classic! I bet she never buys Girl Scout Cookies again.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. orbthefirst says:
    May 27, 2016 at 9:59 AM

    Ive learned that some people face money one way, others another. And change goes in a jar…or on the bathroom counter… 😉
    Im with ya tho on the WTFNESS of that lady. I wouldve read her the riot act myself.

    And that pic cracked me up! 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  3. bikerchick57 says:
    May 27, 2016 at 10:03 AM

    Ohmigosh, Joey, you almost made me snort coffee through my nostrils. I may be a Christian involved in the church, but I would never ever quote scripture like that…because of old-age memory and not being judgmental like that. Too funny, although I suppose it wasn’t funny at the time.

    I never worked at a bank or retail, but I’m old enough to have been taught in school how to count change. My mom and dad worked at a grocery store, so they were also of help. In fact, my dad always kept a “blind man’s wallet” even when his sight wasn’t bad. The bills were always facing the same way, right side up, lowest denomination to highest. I followed suit for a while, but since I downsized my wallet, I have to fold my bills and it’s not easy to keep them in order. Drives me a little nuts, but I’ve learned to adjust.

    I laugh (in my head) every time I encounter a young cashier who can’t count change. It seems to me that it’s very basic math, something everyone should be able to do. Makes me wonder what they are teaching in math class these days.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      May 27, 2016 at 10:16 AM

      I’m glad I gave you a laugh and I’m glad you didn’t choke!
      I understand about the wallet. Surely you’ve noticed they don’t give you time to put your stuff away after the transaction, either. At week’s end, I have tons of receipts crammed in my bag! :/
      I don’t think they’ve stopped teaching it in school, but perhaps it’s a use it or lose it skill. So many cards, so much digital tech, not as much use for it. Still, it bothers me.
      I’m glad you’re not that sort of Christian, I REALLY appreciate that. (Probably everyone does.)
      That lady was so old, it wouldn’t surprise me if she’d known Timothy 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      • bikerchick57 says:
        May 27, 2016 at 10:41 AM

        I never have enough time to put away money and receipts. I have to walk away from the checkout and take care of all that. What really drives me crazy, though, is at a drive-thru, when they hand you your meal and drink and the change all at once as if you have three hands. I really appreciate those that have two windows – one for money transactions and the other to pick up food. It helps.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. coldhandboyack says:
    May 27, 2016 at 10:37 AM

    I haven’t owned money since I got married 24 years ago. Great post though. Trust the machine. The machine is good. The machine will take care of you. (Modern math lesson.)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Petal and Mortar says:
    May 27, 2016 at 11:35 AM

    I am laughing so hard. My money all faces the right way and I constantly make cashiers crazy with my change. DD is the same. Husband on the other hand has no such system. His money is all over the show. It makes me dilly every time I look in his wallet.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Dan Antion says:
    May 27, 2016 at 11:52 AM

    This is funny. I wish I could have been a fly on the cookie counter that day. I’m still facing money. My father taught me to do that when I worked in the bowling alley he managed. Face money and count change back. Also, never put the money the people give you into the cash register before they accept their change. You can respect your elders all you want, but when they say they gave you a twenty, you need to be able to point to the ten and say “no sir, I think you’re mistaken” That final “and (whatever) makes ten” was the contractual close to the transaction. No feedback, put the ten in the drawer.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Holly says:
    May 27, 2016 at 11:54 AM

    I know M panics at the thought of making change because of his dyscalculia (to be overly basic, he has mathematical dyslexia) but I know that can’t the excuse for everyone else I see that can’t figure it out.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      May 27, 2016 at 4:04 PM

      I know all about dyscalculia, and you’re right, it can’t be THAT many people!

      Like

      • Holly says:
        May 27, 2016 at 4:07 PM

        His diagnosis a few years ago was the first I heard of such a thing existing! Makes sense though.

        Liked by 1 person

        • joey says:
          May 27, 2016 at 4:15 PM

          I got found out in the teacher’s program, when I read music, when I tell time, when I borrow and carry. Or, as they call it now ‘regrouping.’ There were a lot, but I always just thought “bad at math” not “brain not wired for math.”
          Honest to goodness, by the time we got our diplomas, most of us had figured out we had been challenged in some way or another. Good for compassion, and a reminder to teach with more than one method.

          Liked by 1 person

  8. Lies Jack Kerouac told Me says:
    May 27, 2016 at 11:54 AM

    Here, I’ll say it for you…”GET OFF MY LAWN!!!”

    Like

  9. larva225 says:
    May 27, 2016 at 12:09 PM

    Oh man, this is genius. I would’ve beaten that woman with a box of cookies. And yes – after way too long in retail, my bills must face correctly or I get the heebie-jeebies.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. vanbytheriver says:
    May 27, 2016 at 12:14 PM

    I do it all the time, and have to announce ahead of time…”just enter the amount of change I gave you into your computer”…watch the magic happen ! I’m always impressed when they don’t show fear. ☺ My first cash handling came on an antique, manual cash register in a drug store.

    And those bills that face every direction…dear God. Have some respect for $, or take a job in the stock room. It’s all about training. A pet peeve…

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Ally Bean says:
    May 27, 2016 at 1:19 PM

    I’m completely willy-nilly about which way my bills face. I used to be concerned about it, but now I consider it rebellion against arbitrary constraints… like the ones in 1 Timothy, for instance. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  12. undiscoverdimagesamongstus says:
    May 27, 2016 at 3:35 PM

    ROFLMAO; great post. Shoulda canceled the sale and said, “think you lost your cookies so no cookies for you” to the lady or cited “2 Corinthians” someone recently did 😉 I agree with your assessment about no more counting back money or the cashiers hired today can only read the computerized cash registers – that’s why everything comes to a halt when there is a power outage (they can’t count change back). Also, I’ve seen some young people whip out credit cards these days for purchases of less than a dollar (the cashless generation) or maybe they fear they can’t count money???

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Luanne says:
    May 27, 2016 at 5:10 PM

    I do, and I like money counted back, too. I also like balancing a paper checkbook register. Apparently none of this is necessary today because we can trust the bank to let us know on our iPhones what our balance is. And we just spend our balance or a little more and then the bank will gobble up some extra money but as long as we keep feeding the balance monster it will be ok.
    When hubby and I owned a retail store (why have I never blogged about this?) he disabled the function on the brand new cash register that told the employee how much change to give back. Then he taught each new employee how to count money back and said, “This’ll keep you on your toes.” One of our old employees has been trying to make contact (but hubby doesn’t email so trying to get him to respond is a little difficult) to tell him how much he learned from him all those years ago. I hope he taught his kids how to count back.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Benson says:
    May 27, 2016 at 5:58 PM

    Show Respect to Your Belongings Lecture Series. That really cracked me up. I have no idea when I first started facing money. Most of my transactions are of the card form. I don’t have that much time left that I want to waste it on some twit that can’t count. As for the Georgia thing I don’t do Georgia. At all.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Pingback: Friday Favorites 5.27.16 | Three's a Herd

  16. startswithmyra says:
    May 27, 2016 at 7:16 PM

    Your best post ever! I found that the self service machine will take all of your change..I put $14.00 in to try it out..hahaha. I love giving change first then they stand there with that dumb look on their face like you are using some foreign object to pay!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Mae McDonnell says:
    May 27, 2016 at 7:53 PM

    I blame Monopoly. It comes with a credit card swiper now.

    I did not make that up.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. cordeliasmom2012 says:
    May 27, 2016 at 7:56 PM

    I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I not only face all my bills the same way in my wallet, I also sort them by denomination. Sounds like the cookie sale lady could use a little sorting herself.

    Liked by 2 people

  19. reocochran says:
    May 28, 2016 at 12:29 PM

    I am appalled at new math and how dependent people are on their cash register, Joey! It is funny, though, yesterday at work, I left my phone locked in my car with my purse. Parked right next to the security gate, mind you. 🙂 I could not really remember all 3 kids plus DIL’s cell phone numbers. . . I finally remembered my oldest daughter who has a difficult number, nothing can help me just sheer relaxing my brains during break. I wanted to text (using a friend’s phone) to tell her I would be an hour longer due to work to pick up Micah to head to Cleveland. This is an example of both age and technology dependency. Remember when we were teens and knew twenty or more phone numbers, Joey? Granted you are more my kids age but you know what I mean, right? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Karen van Benschoten says:
    May 28, 2016 at 2:14 PM

    I used to work in a gas station. All my money faces the right way, and has to be that way, as well as in order 1’s, 5’s, 10’s. Oh. If I had more than one ten in there, they wouldn’t be there at all. I would have spent them, considering it a free purchase since I didn’t use my debit card.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. jan says:
    May 28, 2016 at 5:59 PM

    Haaaaaa! I’m glad to hear that I’m not the only one who had a hard time making change at Girl Scout cookie stands! Dealing with money can befuddle me and that’s not because I’m a good Christian lady who lets the man handle everything.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Anxious Mom says:
    May 29, 2016 at 1:31 AM

    I can’t believe you disrespected the mister like that. Sounds like you needed to have every other bill turned upside down and facing the wrong way 😄

    Liked by 1 person

  23. puppy1952 says:
    May 29, 2016 at 1:41 PM

    Oh this is hilarious! I can count money back (born in the 50s) but I seldom do. Credit card is my main form of payment.

    Like

  24. marianallen says:
    May 29, 2016 at 6:55 PM

    Of course I right-face my money, and I organize it into denominations, with the lowest in front and highest in back. If you don’t put your money all right-way-up and front-side-forward, the presidents get carsick. I thought everybody knew that.

    Liked by 2 people

  26. honestme363 says:
    May 30, 2016 at 10:03 AM

    Thanks for the laughs this morning 😊 I can completely relate to counting back change – I had a kid use his cell phone to calculate it because he didn’t believe I could count?? And of course all the bills face the same way. I really didn’t think there was any other way to do it…

    Liked by 1 person

  27. garym6059 says:
    May 31, 2016 at 11:33 AM

    I actually try my damndest to bewilder cashiers by giving them enough change so i can get only quarters back. It’s like my own little game. My love of fountain drinks is well known, it .85 cents and I will always try and pay for it with a $1.10. It’s high comedy!

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.