I put my bag of new shoes in the trunk and Sassy (then 12) and I got into the car to head home. Sassy had never been to the shoe warehouse. I have no idea how many shoes are in there, but ALAWT seems accurate. She’d been awed. She said she wanted so many new shoes. I said, “When your feet stop growing, you can start investing in shoes. While your feet are growing you just need the basics. When you settle into a size, we’ll buy you more. Terrible thing about being an adult, you sometimes don’t consider you should buy new things, since all your old things still fit you.”
She was quiet for a bit and then she asked, “Is that why you don’t buy me clothes all the time anymore?”
“What?”
“You used to buy me clothes all the time. You hardly ever buy me clothes anymore. You’ll say I need jeans or warmies or whatever and we’ll go get them, but you used to buy me new clothes all the time. Like, all the time.”
OH NO.
“You used to grow so fast, I could barely keep you clothed! I HAD to shop all the time!”
“I feel so much better! I thought you didn’t love me as much anymore.”
“WHAT?”
“I didn’t know.”
“WHAT?”
“I thought…Oh, I just thought…”
“Nooooo!”
Can you imagine the heartbreak and devastation of this conversation? I realize it’s also horrible funny, but Oh My God, my child thought I didn’t love her as much anymore!
When we had Irish twins, people said how great it was that we could pass Sassy’s clothes to Moo. No one could have predicted Sassy would be a giantesse and Moo would be tiny. It takes many years for this gap to close on the clothes.
For most of their childhood, people would ask me how far apart they were and when I answered 14 months, people would be shocked, and I have gotten over being asked if I am sure!
For years, Sassy the Giantesse outgrew everything in a matter of months. One day she wore the blue 6-9 month onesie and then the next day, it was too small. That was the beginning. From that point on, she was in the 90th percentile or off the chart. She was in 3T by one year, in a 7/8 by kindergarten, in the women’s department by fourth grade. She passed her older sister a long time ago. Shopping for her was a constant necessity.
For almost two years, I couldn’t keep her in pants, so I’d buy her oversized dresses to wear with tights, and when those crept up on her, she could wear them with leggins and bike shorts.
Sassy would grow out of clothes in a matter of months, but it would be years before Moo could fit into them.
7 & 6
In contrast, Moo didn’t outgrow her training panties until she was 9. She wore a 6x until fourth grade. Moo could ride in the baby basket of the grocery cart until she was 8. Moo was in a car booster seat until she was 10. For most of her life, nurses nagged me about Moo’s weight, until one day, she finally hit the low end of the normal range. I’ve hardly had to buy Moo any clothes. She always had tubs of clothes to grow into. She still has two right now.
When you’ve got another kid to wear all the clothes, you don’t mind to purchase nice quality items, but when you’ve got one who grows so fast, you also gladly accept hand-me-downs, order a lot from eBay, and shop at thrift stores. It was a lot of shopping, constantly, all her life, okay?
Not too long after we moved here, Sassy’s growth rate slowed down considerably. We didn’t take her shopping all the time, we didn’t buy her new shoes every few months, we didn’t order a box lot of clothes from eBay and take her to the thrift shop almost every weekend. We didn’t need to, since she had stuff that fit.
If you’re a child whose whole life has always involved getting lots of things, whether new or new-to-you, when it stops, you don’t see it as a pleasant end to constant shopping, you think maybe you’re not as loved as you had been. Terrible stuff.
This post was inspired by Sassy’s latest growth spurt. She passed my height this summer. Moo is presumed to be seven, even though she’s twelve. She can fit in your average suitcase.
joeyfullystated 
I still say you dont feed that girl enough. She scrawny. 😉
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Gah! I can’t help it she likes good for you food and never stops moving! lol
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Well, thats good! Healthy girls are happy girls. 🙂
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I am the oldest sister to the middle sister by 2 1/2 years. She was always almost as big as I was. Until now somewhere I was in highschool. She stopped growing earlier, is smaller than me, and weighs less. She grew quickly, I grew slowly, and I am bigger, and grew even past high school about an inch. It’s the old tortoise and hare story I guess. My youngest sister also grew very fast as a child, was very tall in grade school, and now is average in size like I am. I enjoyed your post…brought back memories.
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Sorry…Joey, should proofread before I hit ‘post.’ I wish they included an edit on the reply button. Meant she was taller until now….she stopped growing early, I grew for years after her.
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Thank you, I’m glad you enjoyed it and it brought out your own story. I don’t think Moo will surpass Sassy, but you never can tell 🙂
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Amazing what they think sometimes.
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My children are a foot apart in height. My son is tall and skinny and my daughter a foot shorter and always watching her weight. She constantly yells at me for not giving her the right genes!
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LMAO!
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“…fit into the average suitcase.” Hmm, potential savings on air fare, but… It’s always interesting to see the reactions when children outgrow their parents. I can only imagine how you felt to hear that she thought you didn’t love her 😦
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I only have Moo left to outgrow me. Sometimes we think she’ll always be small, but it’s too early to tell.
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Funny story, but a perfectly logical conclusion for a kid I guess.
I was named by my Grandmother after her firstborn who died from a childhood illness when he was 18 months or so.
The grown-ups in the family used to proudly tell me this story all the time when I was little. But I didn’t see it as a tribute. I just thought that if they named me after the dead kid, it meant I was gonna die young too; kid logic 😛
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I remember that! Yes, kid logic!
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As our boys grew we stopped handing down clothes as they started sharing. None of my kids ever accused me of loving them less. The youngest, when he was about 6 or 7 would tell his Mother she should divorce me whenever he got pissed.It took a while but he finally got his wish.
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Wow. Is he still Mama’s boy?
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I am afraid so.
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Pity.
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I agree but not much I can do about it.
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Yeah.
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Bless her heart!
And wow, you’d think they were 3 or 4 years apart for real. People usually think LM is older because he’s tall, always in the 90th percentile too, but weight is a different matter. He needs a size 10 jeans but can still wear his size 5 night shorts, since he’s so skinny.
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My son was like that. I had to buy pants for Bubba before the elastic-button-adjuster thingies were invented. I bet we spent hundreds on belts in those days. Lots of cut-off jeans in the summer 😉
Moo still has leggins that are 7&8, and even though they’re about up to her knees, she wears them around the house. STILL. We have a ritual celebration when she outgrows clothes! lol
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Those elastic waist adjusters have been a life saver!
Haha!
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Yes Ma’am!
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Oh, this is such a bittersweet story. The way in which kids interpret adult actions can be a surprise. Poor dear, thinking that you didn’t love her anymore. 🙂
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How far apart are your Irish twins? My brothers are eleven months. Jim, the older, was born in December and Kip the following November. Created havoc when Mom tried to enroll them in school, because they wanted to put both in the same class and Mom didn’t want that.
We got hand-me-downs from Mon’s cousin and stepbrother, who aren’t much older than I am. By the time any of us was ready to hand something down, it was ready for the rag bin…
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Hahaha, those poor kids, fodder for Mom’s wicked typing fingers. Sassy looks like a very cute and average-sized skinny kid in that photo . . . . But to the main point: wow, I had no idea a kid could come up with the stuff she comes up with. I hope my kids didn’t overthink things to that degree. Yikes. Makes me feel bad just thinking about her thinking that about you!!!
My cousins were 11 months apart, and the younger was always bigger than the older one. That was kind of awkward for both of them, especially when the younger one needed to start shaving in 5th grade.
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We had that in our extended family as well. My nephew is three years younger than Bubba, but always bigger, taller, thicker. Weird to get hand-me-downs from someone younger. Of course, I enjoy them, too! Giant hoodies and gardening shirts 🙂
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Weird but nice. Always nice to get handmedowns. My daughter used to get some great outfits from my son’s best friend but then one day we realized the girls that were 3 years apart were almost the same size! And my daughter is Asian . . . .
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Is she tiny? I know exactly what you mean, Sassy used to get hand-me-downs from my friend’s daughters, and then one day the box that came became Moo’s box. I told my husband, “Well that gravy train ended!” lol
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The other girl (white girl) was tiny, but my daughter caught right up to her! That’s exactly how I felt–the gravy train ending!
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Haha, yup. Well it was nice while it lasted!
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Moo will probably grow (a little) to be one of those teeny tiny women who look good in anything and gets the best deal on teeny tiny shoe sales.
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Maybe 🙂
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My sons are 5 years apart. Of course I was going to give the youngest all the hand me downs but he was too skinny and tall. He didn’t fit most of what I had stashed. Today he is 6’4″.
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What on Earth are Irish Twins?
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Siblings born close together, less than two years between them, a grade apart, sometimes within the same year.
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Ah, ok.
And the “Irish” part is from where?
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Presumably a term coined to illustrate that lack of birth control. You can always ask Google these things 🙂
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Oh I like to get stuff like this from the people who say it. You’d be amazed at the difference in meanings of the same sayings from different places.
Take “fanny” for instance.
You’d get a very different look if you used it in the same way over here as you do there.
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Haha, yeah 😛
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Bless her, for thinking that you didn’t love her anymore. It sounds like it was hard work keeping her clothed when she was younger.
My daughter is almost as tall as me now, and despite mine and her father’s lack of height, looks like she might end up to be a ‘normal’ height! She is outgrowing her clothes very quickly at the moment too! 🙂
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Beautiful girls. My sister reached her adult heighth by age ten and she’s just average now.
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I am familiar with that, having been the tallest kid in my class at 11. Still only 5’4, lol!
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Those growth hormones are weird.
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That would be me too. My mom thought I was going to be HUGE, but I stopped growing at 10.
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:O
Oh how I used to pray for longer legs. These days, I think longer arms would be more useful! {rockin the t-rex arms over here}
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hahaha!! I have short arms too … but I never really appreciated t-rex arms until I broke my collarbone. Suddenly just my full range of motion would be nice 😉
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I feel your pain. My daughter is only 5 and is in 8s already. She wore newborn stuff for about 3 hours. My son, while tall, is a stringbean. He’s STILL in 18 mo shorts.
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Oh yes, you do know! Yes, your daughter DOES look 8 or 9 🙂
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I’m sitting here smiling at this but envisioning that each of them has their own challenge of probably being told by kids they are too tall or too short. Sucks. I hope Moo gets to go shopping when Sassy buys new clothes to be sure it is something she likes too. 🙂
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They do. Even the eldest, who was ‘normal’ and ‘average’, even ideal in childhood — they all have their challenges. Moo is picky about texture, so she doesn’t take on everything Sassy picks out, and she’s way more into color and pattern, so the clothes she chooses are completely different from Sassy’s plain, mostly black stuff. Moo is fun to dress, she enjoys clothes 🙂 I didn’t mean I don’t buy clothes for Moo, just that I really don’t have to.
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This was so adorable, amusing yet deep – It’s a great insight as to how a child’s mind works, right? I hope Moo doesn’t think that since she isn’t growing, you don’t feed her enough 😛 I am already feeling for Moo – At 25 I still have to buy from the girl’s section! Nothing in Women’s fits me.
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Poor Sassy. I understand her logic
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Moo is very similar to my daughter it sounds like! She is still wearing shirts from ages 5-6 and she’s damn near nine!
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Yep. They do have quite a bit in common, I’ve noticed it too 🙂
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#smartgirls #wittyparents
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My triplets wear 3 different sizes. I realized that my oldest was feeling frustrated that he only got the brother’s hand me downs. He is the one who likes clothing and fashion the most. He also takes care not to slop, spill or stain things. I decided last spring that even though shirts still fit from Kindergarten, he would appreciate something new as a 3rd grader. He loved it so much. Sometimes, people want something new, or new to them, because it feels good. Being in a financial position to buy an occasional want, not just needs is so powerful.
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I agree. Moo loves clothes and fashion and is more careful as well. It’s a pleasure to shop for her, because it’s never about needs. She ends up choosing vivid colors and patterns.
Also, I feel sad for you that all 3 wear different sizes.That must be difficult for them, too at times. Or not. I don’t know, some boys don’t care.
Thanks for sharing with me today, Jen 🙂
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So heartfelt. I almost cried. Its so funny that in every families there are large disparities between siblings. Love this post! 💕
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