If you’re reading mental health bloggers, you’ve probably read plenty about people who stop taking their medication. There’s some sort of shame or stigma attached to this and those who’ve done it. I’ve heard people berate themselves and say they knew better and they can’t believe they did that. I always have the same reaction, “Why wouldn’t you do that?”
This is why doctors have to tell us to finish taking all of our antibiotics. We’ll feel better, and we’ll forget we need them.
One’s perception of normal is completely relative. Some people feel their own version of normal when they’re unmedicated. Some people feel their own version of normal when they’re medicated.
I don’t want to generalize too much, and I certainly don’t want to be too specific, BUT if you are a person or love a person who has this pattern, I’m hoping to make you see this in a different way.
Please stop thinking there is something wrong with you when you stop taking your meds and find yourself remorseful. It is a human thing to do. That’s why it’s COMMON. Yes, it can be dangerous. No, you shouldn’t stop cold turkey, on a whim, just because you’re having a particularly good Monday, but you can’t hate yourself for it.
People do this with all kinds of medication.
People who don’t have mental health issues.
I am a long-time allergy sufferer. I’m an allergic disaster waiting to happen. We do not need to talk about the condition or the medication to relate. Just assume in my 40-some years, I have taken lots of meds for allergies.
My children have allergies. Moo the worst.
As Moo’s mother, I must nag her about taking her allergy meds.
If her throat and ears itch madly, she will enthusiastically swallow a teaspoon of honey and 10ml of nasty-tasting liquid antihistamine for immediate relief. If her skin freaks out, she will gladly soak in an oatmeal bath or rub any number of recommended products onto her skin.
When her allergies aren’t drastically affecting her life, she doesn’t want to take any of the meds or even rub anything on her most susceptible areas. At no point does she ever want to take her nasal spray.
I see it coming.
She wakes up hoarse.
I hear the slurping of snot.
I see her stop drawing to swipe at her nose.
Her energy isn’t as high.
She requires more affection.
It is a BATTLE to get her to take her meds when she doesn’t feel poorly. If I don’t coerce her to take her pill and sniff her spray, she just won’t.
We go through days of this, “Did you take your sniffer? Do your sniffer!”
She never wants to take the sniffer.
“MAMA! NOOOO! IT WAS JUST TWO SNEEZES! I’M OKAY!”
It could take a few days or even a week for her to get to a point where she actually feels as snotty as she seems. By then, she might have a chronic cough, be vomiting mucus — well on her way to a respiratory infection.
It’s my job to prevent that.
So I line the medicine cup up with the nasal spray, the honey, the pill, and the hot tea. It takes three days of consistent care to end her suffering. Then she feels all better and doesn’t want to take the meds. Again.
It’s not because she’s a child, it’s because she’s human.
joeyfullystated 
I’m the same way. If it doesn’t kill me I don’t need meds. Now I take blood pressure meds every day. I learned.
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It’s very common. Glad you take yours! Thanks for chimin in 🙂
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I am a lot older than Moo and I do the same thing. Don’t know why. Just do. After a day or two I feel shitty and tell myself never again. I know that’s a load. I’ll probably do it again.
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Truly.
So common! 🙂
I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again. I really enjoy sleeping without coughing. You’d think I could remember that… 😉
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I think when I “forget” to take my pills I am just being hard headed. When I try to scrimp on my inhalers I am rationalizing that I am saving money. Then I realize that the money saved isn’t worth a damn if I can’t enjoy it.
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Mmhm. Breathing is important!
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This one speaks to so many of us, Joey. With my Dr.’s approval, I stopped taking cholesterol meds 2 years ago. The muscle aches and pains…just not worth it. It’s such a personal decision to med/not med. Well written piece on an important issue. Hugs to your allergy sufferers.
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Thanks.
Yes, it is a personal thing, and everyone’s different, and doctors matter — but it’s such a universally human debacle.
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After years of taking pain meds for severe, chronic, back pain; wife’s new doc says, “I think you may be one of those people whose pain is made worse by opioids.” We didn’t know that happened. It’s gunna be interesting to see how all of that turns out. For years, I’ve taken same stuff my neighbor has taken. Side effects kick his butt, but I notice none. How can we all be so different and so much that same?
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I don’t know, but as a person who’s sensitive to all kinds of medications, I can tell you it’s a terrible learning process to find out what helps and what hurts!
I often wonder if there won’t be a blood-typing or something in the future. Something that helps doctors prescribe the right medication per tolerance and whatnot. I’ll remain hopeful.
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It’s a difficult one all right. None of us want to take unnecessary medicine- but it can be hard to figure out what is and what’s not necessary. As a mum of a boy with asthma- I hounded him for
years to take his inhalers. I’m glad he’s old enough to make the call himself now.
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Yes, good for him! Moo will get there, I’m sure 🙂
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Currently not on any regular meds. Hard to say what I’ll be like if/when it becomes necessary. As an anemic child, I had to be (and was) forced to take Cod Liver Oil. It’s the worst alleged medical product made, and no amount of logic was going to sway me. “You want to grow up to be big and string, don’t you?” “no. I’m big and strong enough” and like that, day in and day out. My mom can still work up a good hiss when we talk about it. I don’t feel bad about it. – Very good post!
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Oh yeah. I’ll leave the child nameless, but one of them SPIT the antibiotic into my shirt. I can still hiss about that, too.
I was anemic until my life revolved around cast iron skillets. Isn’t that terrible? Now fish oil’s in tasteless capsules, did you know that?
Thanks for the compliment 🙂
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I knew about the capsules for modern anemics. Nothing tasteless back in the late 50s. Bottle with an eye-dropper cap, or a spoonful from a larger bottle. No amount of sugar made helped that go down. You’re welcome, this is the kind of post that can make someone feel better.
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🙂
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I have a very, very close friend who was on antidepressants (that she never should have been on in the first place, but that’s for another time) because the side effects were so awful and just added to her depression. Anyway, she got the withdrawals and went into hypomania. It was rough. She is on a taper now, and I am very glad. I get not wanting to be on meds, and no, there should never be stigma. I just think meds should be a last-line, but lazy doctors like to make it a first.
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You and I are close in opinion here, so I appreciate your similar train of thought. 🙂
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I’m religious about it. I always take my meds. Nothing earth shattering, but it seems to me that if I do need them, I need them in me rather than in the bottle. lol….But I do recognize the import of what you mean…it’s so easy to stop taking stuff when you have no symptoms.
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You’re a good girl! The pills work much better when they’re in you, excellent point! 🙂
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Admittedly I’m the same way. Even right now I’m assessing how badly I’m congested and whether it warrants antihistamines.
…but thanks for the connection to the respiratory infection. Gah! I can’t believe I didn’t know that before now and all those years of ENDLESS infections. During the last one I actually preferred to wheeze than take the inhaler. They’re just awful. I think I might have been doing it wrong. I don’t think it’s normal to throw up every time you use it … so I just stopped trying.
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OMG Joanne!!! Yes, untreated allergies can lead to all kindsa nastiness! :O You gotta see the dr and ask about other kinds of treatments — mention the vomiting, Omaword! And mercy, you poor thing!
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Ironically, my doctor’s office called ME today to book an appointment. I’ll take your advice and mention this problem. Thanks.
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Good luck 🙂
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When I started the job I had now, I felt so much better that I decided I would gradually cut down my antidepressants Problem is I didn’t do it gradually enough, and going from 150mg to 20mg in 3 months, did me more harm than good! Suffice it to say I am back up to full strength 😦
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Oh yes, that must have been such a tailspin. Here’s hoping you find your balance, Judy! 😀
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Thanks, Joey. Hopefully I am there now 🙂
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Feel your pain but have finally learned my lesson 😀
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This is really a brilliant way to think of this. I often get angry/upset at my husband when he goes through spells if not wanting to take meds for his depression and ADHD, despite it having a very obvious impact on his affect. I should take Zyrtec every day, but can’t be bothered unless “it’s bad.” Thanks for a new way to think about this.
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I can imagine your frustration, I really can.
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Unfortunately, I have a tendency with any of my meds except those for my MS and those for Borderline Personality Disorder. If I were to stop taking any of those for BPD, the withdrawal would be horrendous and my symptoms would come crashing down on top of me. Don’t think I’d care for that…
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I am glad you value the stability your meds provide. It’s nice you’re not in the undecided group about those two. 🙂
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We go through the allergy med discussion constantly. My husband thinks he knows better than the pollen levels. For me? I’m glad I’m human. I don’t really feel bad for wanting to come off medications, but I believe that if 1/4 of something works as well than a whole, why not take the 1/4? I know I’m not unique in this medication fiasco, but I swear my doctor gives me a pill which causes another symptom. He then gives me another medication to counteract the symptoms of the first……well, you can see where I’m going with this. I would think if I have side effects from the first one that would require a new medication to counter the first that maybe the first one wasn’t the right medication. I’m with you and wish there were a test to target medication for particular diseases.
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I really think generations behind us will have them.
I totally understand about the side effects, yes ma’am, I do.
I wrote this a long time ago and I wanted to publish it when it didn’t seem directed at any one person, because I know it’s a delicate issue for some. I just think it’s so common and normal, there’s no reason it should be delicate or taboo.
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Brain meds aside, I’ve been getting my butt kicked by going Moo’s route and not taking my allergy and asthma meds. First it was a sniffle, then a full blown cold, and now bronchitis that’s determined to stick around. My promises to the asthma gods that I’ll use my inhaler properly from now on has fallen on deaf ears 😛
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Dammit, E! Take yer sniffer!!!
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I don’t suffer allergies like you all. My sister does, she has lost her sense of smell. I feel so bad for her. It took me 20+ years to finally have the courage to get placed on a mood stabilizer. I take 10mg Thorazine 3 times a day. At first I was hesitant. Taking it meant I had to admit something about myself. I had to admit that I’m crazy. Or at least that is how I perceived it in my mind. My psychologist said,”your not crazy, far from it!” She put it to me like this, I take prednisone to keep my blood platelets up, synthroid for my thyroid. I take these for medical conditions, for diseases. My chemical imbalance in my mind is no different. It is a physical deficiency and the pill corrects it. My mind still fights that reasonableness. But I know it’s the truth. I didn’t want to admit I wasn’t strong enough to fight this on my own. I should have been able to continue to fight, but I’m tired. I’m 41, I fought for 20 years. And everyone around me suffered and now I carry regret and guilt for that, and a myriad of other things. Almost been on a month. I feel better, but a week before my period, I’m still ferocious. A raging lunatic, usually. So maybe 30mg isn’t enough. I see the psychiatrist next week to evaluate my medication. My fight now is to continue to take it. To not go back. I’m not great, but I’m better. And everyone around me is suffering less, and so am I.
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I’m sorry you seem to suffer, but I am glad there are medicines available to make you feel better 🙂 It’s hard to admit our problems, especially to ourselves, so you’re not alone there. So happy you are continuing forward with your doctors.
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