One day, probably a Tuesday, I woke up in a foul mood. I have no idea why. I contemplated my mood briefly and found no reason for it.
Of course, once you’re already in a bad mood, it super easy to get pissy about most anything.
“Sadie! OFF!” Moo shouted so she could take her place. Moo always wants to talk in the mornings, but on that day, she came to snuggle, quietly, sweetly. This made both of us even more reluctant to leave the bed.
I made coffee and I paused to consider my gratitude for coffee.
I turned to my laundry.
I had grocery bags and a rug in the wash.
When I opened the dryer, the darks were still there.
“Fuck.this.shit,” I said to no one, because my bed wasn’t made and I didn’t want to make the bed and I didn’t want to fold and hang the darks. I slammed the laundry door.
I began my stretching. Then I sorta sprawled on the floor, staring at one of our five million nipple-shaped lights. I tried to blame my mood on my hatred of the nipple light, and then on the lady who had them installed, but it didn’t work. I flopped over and noticed two dust bunnies under the sofa table and I inchwormed my way over to those and clutched them in my angry lil hand, making a mental note not to bonk my head on the chair on the way back up, but of course, I bonked my head on the chair on my way back up.
I decided that was the most exercise I was gonna do and thought about a shower. I hate washing my hair. It takes about 30 hours for my hair to calm down, so I really try to maximize the benefits of already calm hair before starting all over again.
With smooth and straightened hair and still a bad disposition, I attempted to word. Some post that I will one day edit and publish. That’s the trick to keeping your public neuroses to a minimum you know. Write about it while you feel it, and then edit and publish it another day.
I made the bed, tackled that laundry, and went to work.
Sometimes work is exactly the sorta thing one needs. At work, I can’t sit around and contemplate the stuff that sticks in my craw, because you know, work.
Which is why, I must say, I am not a good mother at work. I mean, yes, while I carefully nibble grapes alone in my office, I think about how I hope they’re not eating grapes, because they’re probably leaning over the counter, tossing grapes into their mouths while they laugh, and they’ll probably choke and die, but I also don’t want to respond to texts about how there are only three cookies left and they don’t know what to do, when really, I am fully aware they have the math aptitude to solve that problem.
So yesterday, I bout lost my mind, because the boy one did not listen to us last week and then wanted me to provide a rescue route today, and as I responded to his texts, I thought i will calm down, i will soon be mad only at the situation and not at the person, but that didn’t actually happen. Like when you stub your toe and you wait for the pain to subside, but instead it increases and begins to bleed? As time passed, I grew downright hostile with the amount of reasons the whole thing pissed me off.
Getting disconnected from an important call at work prolly did not help.
Drivin in the dark definitely did not help.
Shoppin for Thursday’s dinner at two different stores prolly did not help.
Coming home to discover I’m out of kosher salt definitely did not help.
Tryin to yank the frozen neck out of my supposedly fresh turkey prolly did not help.
To put the level of my anger into perspective, you should know that The Mister was calm and dedicated to handling the matter while I whisper-screamed at my dog about the insanity of it all. I’ll probably publish that in five years, when we can all laugh about it. I think it will be titled, “Grow the fuck up!” which is funny, because I am still growing the fuck up.
“How did you do that without screaming, WE TOLD YOU SO?”
“Next time.”
Ugh. Next time.
Even though I had trouble getting out of bed before noon, I feel like this second Tuesday will be a better one than most. After all, my hair is already calm, the cookie jar is full, and well, I married the right man.
joeyfullystated 
Yeah.
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I always wanted curly hair…mine was straight, never had to iron it back in the day, so that was a good thing. ☺ Great last sentence.
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🙂
Sassy had stick-straight hair until puberty. Now all of us envy Moo’s moderately wavy hair. Nice lie-down hairs she has.
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I am beginning to think maybe the right mate is more important than I have ever thought. You can wake up shitty,even pseudo psycho and yet with the right person with you things never get so out of hand you do something really crazy. Who’d have thunk it. Glad you were able to carry on to a better Tuesday.
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Oh yes, gotta have balance. When both our tempers flare, that’s a problem.
Today is much better. I am so glad I’m home. So glad for salad and frozen pizza. 🙂
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Thank goodness you found the right man! When my anger would get out of control, my ex would react, divert, deflect,and gaslight, instead of try to help me resolve whatever I was upset about (not always him, but he made everything about him). Here’s to better Tuesdays!
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Had yourself a big ol Narcissist, didn’tcha? Shame. *tsk* Here’s to better Tuesdays! 🙂
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Aye Joey, that I did.. thanks hun!
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“Write about it while you feel it, and then edit and publish it another day.” Good advice! I don’t have the will power not to publish right away.
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🙂
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Ah, Tuesdays! I’m feeling quite calm this particular Tuesday, which worries me as I am waiting for shit to hit the fan about a work matter here, but clinging to hope that the outcome will actually be cause for celebration, not execution. I am also thinking how I used to want curly hair when I lived in Saskatchewan, and now I have curly hair living in BC, but use a straightening iron to get rid of the curls. Anyway, I hope your Tuesday today is a good one – and hold onto that man!!
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I hope your work outcome was swell 🙂
I love the straightening iron, I do. We always want what we don’t have. 🙂
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I remember my hairs. They’re mostly all gone now. To this day, I have no idea what I did wrong. I wanted them to stay. Any texture, any color, any length. Wherever they are, I bet they’re feeling mighty gray about leaving me with so few.
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Pity. I think men go bald to prove their virility. Surely you wouldn’t trade virility for hairs? That is not my business, but I think I prefer my husband bald. Not that he didn’t have gorgeous locks long ago…
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Right, joey. Why waste hormones growing hair? LOL Life is easier without it, but I would take each hair back if I could.
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I just need you to know that until I saw this in my inbox, I thought it was Wednesday. 😦
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Oh how sad. Terribly sorry.
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Not your fault.
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I hate to be the messenger.
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The right man and a full cookie jar can really help a girl along. 🙂
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Truth.
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I’m having a rough week and it’s only Tuesday … so this post talked to me.
My hair is an unholy mess, but I have lots of cookies and my man is taking care of me too ❤
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Bless. Nothin like the right person to fix a wrong mood. ❤
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Tomorrow IS another day, Rhett. 🙂
janet
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It is. And today was 10x better. 🙂
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👍😎👌
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Maybe you deserve to empty the cookie jar after the day you had?? Think of it this way… Wednesday is already better 😀
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I meant that the girls wouldn’t have to halve any cookies as there are plenty, but I did enjoy some salad and frozen pizza 😉
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I have naturally curly hair and when people ask me how I get it curly I kind of want to choke them, because you know, it’s NATURALLY curly. A sore point with me, I’m afraid.
I believe that wallowing in a bad day is the way to go. You need to keep a running tally of all the injustices that fate has foisted on you on that particular day. Then make certain that all your loved ones know that you’re having a bad day. Don’t be a martyr to nice.
And as for getting the frozen turkey neck out of the fresh turkey, isn’t that a perfect metaphor for this entire time of year? Seems like the things that should be, aren’t what they claim to be.
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I’m just one day from pie, I can make it. Hell, maybe I’ll eat pie when I get home. I AM the mommy!
How about, “Maybe you should BRUSH your hair?” How ya like that one? LOL 😛
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Ugh! I hate those days when I feel grainy. It’s like I’m sandpaper and everything in the world is a match just waiting to rub me the wrong way and burst into flame. UGH!
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Yes ma’am. ❤ Me too.
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I love to read your stuff and I’m going to try your technique next time I’m mad or neurotic, because I think my problem is, I edit as I go too much. I stifle myself. Always have. Except when I write SOC which is hard to do but tends to be a little funnier. Your writing cracks me up (inside my head bc of the stifling) and reminds me of SOC. Now I’m imagining what your un-edited stuff is like.
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I hope you find it useful. 🙂
And thank you!
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That sounds like the kind of day when it is more safe to go back to bed.
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So, as you gather around that half fresh turkey tomorrow, you have your line all ready – I’m thankful for my hair is already calm, the cookie jar is full, and well, I married the right man. 🙂
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I speak the truth 🙂
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At least you have a bit of self-control, Joey. When I get mad, I write it down, don’t bother to edit and press ‘publish’ straight away…..then I end up making the post private as I have upset someone!
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I learned the EXTREMELY hard way not to write/post when you are uber pissed off. Like get dragged into court and ordered to pay other attorney fees kind of hard way :(. The Mister has the Zen of a monk it sounds like.
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The Mister has a terrible temper, but there was no way he could touch my ire that day!
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I hope you got that neck out by now. That makes me glad I don’t have to fool with a turkey, since I wouldn’t be up to grabbing out parts or anything. Happy Thanksgiving 😀
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