One-Liner Wednesday — Late Night Thoughts with Joey

Posted on November 30, 2016 by joey

“I cannot possibly be the first wife to wonder why I’m shoving foam into my ears instead of up his nose.”

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One-Liner Wednesday is brought to you by LindaGHill

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About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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39 Responses to One-Liner Wednesday — Late Night Thoughts with Joey

  1. lorriedeck says:
    November 30, 2016 at 10:11 AM

    I have them too. My earplugs are pink. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dan Antion says:
    November 30, 2016 at 10:18 AM

    Just make sure you can still hear the smoke alarm. Oh, and wake him up on your way out.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. bikerchick57 says:
    November 30, 2016 at 10:28 AM

    I used to live with a snoring machine. His father was even worse. Imagine then, sharing a hotel room with the in-laws and listening to a freight train and locomotive all night long. I forgot to bring the foam…

    Liked by 1 person

  4. JoAnna says:
    November 30, 2016 at 11:27 AM

    Wondering what % of noise your foam blocks. The foam ear plugs I’ve tried only muffle the noise, like by half. I use a sound machine sometimes with white noise. Thinking there must be some kind of soft comfy ear muffs that are sound proof. You’d think in this day of technology….. But at least I’m not alone.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      November 30, 2016 at 11:34 AM

      Well, you could try the noise-cancelling earbuds, but I can’t sleep with music in my ears, gives me strange dreams, even classical. :/
      My earplugs don’t have a % on them, they’re just orange 32 from Walgreens. I’ve tried several this year, and those are the ones I’ve had the most success with. I change em out each Sunday.
      Most nights, they work just dandy, but now and again one falls out or I remove them in my sleep, or he snores right into my face 😛
      I get much better sleep, have all year (started Jan 1) but they’re not fail-proof.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. bedlamanddaisies says:
    November 30, 2016 at 11:50 AM

    I need to try this! I haven’t used ear plugs because I was always worried I wouldn’t hear the kids in the night.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Anxious Mom says:
    November 30, 2016 at 12:02 PM

    Gah, my husband is bad, too. Nose strips and a mouth guard work wonders until he decided that he just didn’t like them. (Asshole.) When the kids are older, I’ll get ear plugs, too.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Benson says:
    November 30, 2016 at 12:08 PM

    Or “I can’t believe I am putting this pillow over my head when I should be putting it over his face.”

    Liked by 3 people

  9. sustainabilitea says:
    November 30, 2016 at 12:45 PM

    Oh, I understand completely. No explanation needed. 🙂

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Bradley says:
    November 30, 2016 at 2:56 PM

    I use to shake the entire apartment complex until I got a CPAP machine. Now I sleep soundly like a baby.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Fourth Generation Farmgirl says:
    November 30, 2016 at 6:01 PM

    I would use earplugs if I could, because heaven knows I need them. My ear canals are too small; the earplugs just pop out! 🙄

    Liked by 1 person

  12. loisajay says:
    November 30, 2016 at 7:11 PM

    Oh geez….I didn’t get it until I read the comments. Luckily, I do not sleep with a snorer.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Judy @ NewEnglandGardenAndThread says:
    November 30, 2016 at 8:44 PM

    You need a ‘laughing out loud’ button for this one. I have green and orange ones. Oh my gosh, we should start a support group. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  14. reocochran says:
    November 30, 2016 at 10:13 PM

    Ah, snoring husband! I had the Dear Abby column which suggested sewing tennis balls in the back of pajama tops and bottoms since snoring is rarely done on your side(!) 🙂 I tried this but then as I got more impatient, just would nudge him in the arm which made him (“the ex”) turn on to his side.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. vanbytheriver says:
    December 1, 2016 at 8:16 AM

    I don’t plug…I just roll his ass over, and over, and over. ☺

    Liked by 1 person

  16. jan says:
    December 1, 2016 at 2:47 PM

    I’ve wondered the same myself!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. garym6059 says:
    December 8, 2016 at 12:05 PM

    I’m sending reps from the Local 182 Snorers Union to picket your house!

    Liked by 1 person

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