One-Liner Wednesday — Drivin The Mister

Posted on May 10, 2017 by joey

The Mister braced himself for the speed of my driving, how he does.

“Whatever. I’m an excellent driver,” I said.
“Okay, Rainman,” The Mister retorted.

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One-Liner Wednesday is brought to you by LindaGHill

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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30 Responses to One-Liner Wednesday — Drivin The Mister

  1. Alicia Butcher Ehrhardt says:
    May 10, 2017 at 11:51 AM

    My mother and my father would each get us to Acapulco from Mexico City (back in the days of the 7-hour winding mountain drive), but Daddy did it with insouciance, and you could hardly feel the curves; and Mother gripped the Wheel of Death.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      May 10, 2017 at 11:56 AM

      LOL!
      My kids prefer when I drive. The Mister does not prefer anyone’s driving to his own. He likes to be in control. Mostly cause he drove in war zones and stuff.

      Like

      • Alicia Butcher Ehrhardt says:
        May 10, 2017 at 12:02 PM

        That would be part of it: Mother did the driving mostly as a relief driver if Daddy was with us; and to get us to Acapulco when he couldn’t come (he’d come down for the weekends on the bus). She got us there safely – in the days before seatbelts, with the toddlers and babies in the back of the stationwagon. Ah, the memories! But it was a little white-knuckle.

        Liked by 2 people

  2. bikerchick57 says:
    May 10, 2017 at 12:25 PM

    From one lead foot to another…nice driving.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. sustainabilitea says:
    May 10, 2017 at 12:29 PM

    He may have driven in war zones overseas, but driving in Chicago and Philly is much the same, I think, minus the possible IEDs and so on. Right now, driving on I-80 in Indiana is much the same due to construction!! 🙂

    janet

    Like

  4. Fannie Frankfurter says:
    May 10, 2017 at 1:04 PM

    “Ten minutes to Wapner.”

    Liked by 1 person

  5. John Holton says:
    May 10, 2017 at 1:07 PM

    Five minutes to Wapner…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. larva225 says:
    May 10, 2017 at 2:59 PM

    What is it with husbands and driving????

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Erika says:
    May 10, 2017 at 3:11 PM

    And I don’t know about the Mister, but mine gripes and guess who has never had a ticket or had a wreck other than a bump up that wasn’t her fault? 👌🏻

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Judy E Martin says:
    May 10, 2017 at 3:12 PM

    I usually let my husband do the driving, unless of course we go anywhere where there is alcohol then I have to do it as I don’t drink!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. darsword says:
    May 10, 2017 at 3:47 PM

    Just put me in the driver’s seat on a road with no traffic and eat my dust! And I am singing at the tops of my lungs!!!! Ah, memories! Ex used to call me Mario Andretti. We got there. Aren’t speed limits just suggestions for staying with the traffic? Raised in L.A. areas you had to go fast to catch up. No traffic? Go to the head of the class! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Lies Jack Kerouac told Me says:
    May 10, 2017 at 3:50 PM

    I’ll save him a seat at my next Control Freaks Anonymous meeting.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Benson says:
    May 10, 2017 at 5:19 PM

    Some roads just call out for speed. As I age I avoid Interstate highways more and more. I just don’t trust the other folks.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      May 10, 2017 at 6:49 PM

      I get that. Unfortunately those same people drive off the interstate, too, but not usually at the 80mph mark!
      I went home on interstates today, did about 7-10 the entire time, lol!

      Liked by 2 people

  12. Dan Antion says:
    May 10, 2017 at 5:24 PM

    Just tell the Mister “hang on and hold my beer!”

    My wife always reaches for the grab-bars when I take the curvy on ramp but I haven’t rolled nothing over. My neighbor, in the other hand, rolled his Nisssn pick over while backing out of his driveway!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Maggie Wilson says:
    May 10, 2017 at 9:09 PM

    What’s the opposite of lead foot? That’s what my husband has. Because he wants to maintain the longevity of the vehicle. Drives me nuts, especially when he takes his foot off the gas and coasts the last six blocks home, going slower….and slower…. And I have to pee!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      May 11, 2017 at 10:09 AM

      My husband is similarly afflicted with, shall we say, feather foot? I can’t say he coasts six blocks home, but there are definitely times his speed doesn’t match my bathroom needs.
      I recall a recent incident in which I yelled at him, “You’re doin 52 on the interstate, are you even tryin to get me home?!?”

      Liked by 1 person

  14. LindaGHill says:
    May 10, 2017 at 11:04 PM

    HA!Hahahahahaha! What a great relationship you two have. 😀 ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  15. Jaded Jeni says:
    May 11, 2017 at 12:24 AM

    My anxiety is freaking out, lol. I’m a nervous wreck when I’m in a car with anyone other than Matt. Since day one, I’ve felt 110% safe with him driving. He really is an excellent driver. If that was an award, he’d have it a million times over, lol. I’m sure you’re an amazing driver, too, but uh… I’ll walk, lol!

    My mom was in so many car crashes that it put me off of wanting to learn how to drive and now here I am, 33 years old and still no license. No shame. Okay… a little shame. *sigh*

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:
      May 11, 2017 at 10:05 AM

      The trauma is real.
      I’m glad Matt drives you around 🙂 I usually WANT The Mister to drive me around. I’d rather ride, even without trauma.
      But I’m a better driver than he is. He’s not a bad driver, just, I’m better. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  16. bedlamanddaisies says:
    May 12, 2017 at 4:43 PM

    I’m the bracer, but it’s more about the issue of not being in control, not speed. I drive faster than him on most Interstate travels.

    Like

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