Double Standards

Posted on June 9, 2017 by joey

“Wanna go to bed early?” The Mister asked me.
I looked at the clock and said, “Sure, but not THIS early.”
PSHAW!
His eyes hardened.
I rolled my eyes, shifted my voice up a few octaves and faked a smile. With fluttering lashes I nodded. “Yes, but later please.” Ever indignant, I added, “I dunno why I gotta talk sweet to you. You not talk sweet to me.”

That’s some sexist shit, right there.

“It’s because I have a penis.”
“Well then I will wear a strap-on and talk as I like.”

And then how he laughed and laughed!

Happy Friday Everyone!

wise-words-have-been-spoken

 

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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32 Responses to Double Standards

  1. loisajay says:
    June 9, 2017 at 8:41 AM

    You so crazy! Have a good one, Joey.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. orbthefirst says:
    June 9, 2017 at 8:44 AM

    Having my Other ask me if Id like to go to bed “early” with them sounds pretty sweet to me. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. marianallen says:
    June 9, 2017 at 8:51 AM

    I laughed and laughed, too. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  4. JoAnna says:
    June 9, 2017 at 10:32 AM

    I’m reminded of a picture I saw yesterday about sexual intimacy. (No, it was not a strap on.) It was a panel with buttons with on/off switches. The top half was for males and had one simple on/off switch in the center. The bottom half of the panel was for females. There were about twenty different buttons and knobs of all shapes and sizes with various settings. Yep. That’s right, I said.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Dan Antion says:
    June 9, 2017 at 12:24 PM

    I’m just gonna leave it at having pressed the like button…moving away slowly now.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. bikerchick57 says:
    June 9, 2017 at 8:10 PM

    You can say what you want, Joey, regardless if a 9″ plastic tube is strapped around your waist or not. 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Fourth Generation Farmgirl says:
    June 9, 2017 at 9:12 PM

    Y’all seem to laugh a lot together! In my opinion, it’s chemistry like yours that makes a relationship work well. Enjoy your weekend! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Alice says:
    June 10, 2017 at 8:06 AM

    When shopping for your strap-on, might I suggest looking for one with some glitter in its silicone? Phallic empowerment is always more fun with a dash of pretty! #notsayingthiscuzyoureagirl #wannabesuperclearonthatpoint #cisdudeswishtheycouldhaveglittertoo #prettyisforEVERYONE

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Peter Wells aka Countingducks says:
    June 10, 2017 at 1:01 PM

    Hilarious. That made me laugh as well !

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Lies Jack Kerouac told Me says:
    June 10, 2017 at 4:44 PM

    Hard to argue with that logic (bad pun intended).

    Liked by 1 person

  12. pluviolover says:
    June 10, 2017 at 6:12 PM

    Him, “I love you. I brought you flowers, and I want to go to bed early and make hot love with you all night.”
    Her, “Why are you being so damn nice to me, and what’s her name?”

    (“Here’s all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.” ~ George Carlin)

    Liked by 1 person

  13. larva225 says:
    June 12, 2017 at 9:20 AM

    Damn. Maybe I need a strap-on so that when I say that I want to go to bed early (and nicely at that!) I won’t catch hell. We’re adults. Why can’t we go to bed if we want to or not????

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Prajakta says:
    June 12, 2017 at 1:31 PM

    Ha ha ha 😀 I need to remember that one…

    Liked by 1 person

  15. bedlamanddaisies says:
    June 12, 2017 at 8:39 PM

    Thanks for the great laugh! Hubby doesn’t like to go to bed without me so I always go to bed much earlier than my night owl self would like.

    Liked by 1 person

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