This weather is unholy.
I can’t even with this. Autumn, my ass. A good weekend to stay my ass inside. I should eat Caprese salad and binge-watch television.
Orrr, turn off all the lights and worship The Dark Side of the Moon from the carpeting, which I shall, in the moment, pretend is shag.
Ooh, or get wasted on margaritas and write a novel that completely defines what it’s like to live in America right now.
Everyone’s online, posting photos of their last suppers, offended by slaughterhouses instead of genocide. Old enough to know better, still confusing love and sex, but with more beards and tattoos. Everyone’s anxious, depressed, or both. Everyone’s lookin for a fix. Those who need it most can’t afford tequila or benzos or excessive chocolate cake because their health insurance costs more than their rent, but it only covers twelve therapy sessions a year, and they gotta save up those appointments for November and December, like their finest perfume, booking ahead to get through the holidays when they’re guilted into mashing potatoes with the family members who abused them. So they work and they fill out paperwork and they go to the gym and post selfies and caption that Hustle and drink all the coffee and never, ever sleep and when they do, they dream of the world as it is and wake longing for death, revolution, dystopia …
BUT THE ART IS GOOD.
I never said it would be an inspirational novel. Chicken soup for your soul, but the chickens are rabid, the noodles are gluten-free, and instead of carrots and celery, it’s just shards of colored glass.
Do you know sometimes I’m accused of being a Pollyanna? Of being too optimistic?
Fuck that noise.
I walk this earth like the light I am, but I see all its darkness.
Since you might not be blessed with my relentless hope, and you might not live for the arts, let me tell you some things that cheer me right up:
- It could be worse
- I am loved and so are you
- It’s Friday
- Winter is coming
- Tequila is on sale somewhere
Happy Friday Everyone!
joeyfullystated 
Wow that was a great post. LOL But now I’m exhausted and need a nap.
The weather here is too hot and still humid, but it’s pretty normal for this area at this time of year. Unfortunately.
Happy Friday and hopefully happy weekend.
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Thanks. Yes, let’s hope it’s a good one 🙂
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Now this is the doctur joey I have come to know and love –
but the art is good… LMAO
but on a more serious note, your dense paragraph (on the possible book content) really taps into an artery of the American culture here.
….because their health insurance costs more than their rent
and so many more lines that have layers and layers
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Thank you. I appreciate the hell out of that compliment. ❤
Those layers will go over some heads, but then, I don't know why those heads read me anyway.
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Happy Friday–
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Lying on the carpet, listening to Dark Side of the Moon, and drinking margaritas sounds damn cool. ❤ ❤ ❤
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Glad you agree 🙂
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Happy first day of fall (NOT)! It’s still 90+ degrees here by 9am and I am dying. But uhhhh, coming over for that caprese! xx
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Right? Ugh. *fans us both* 🙂
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That Caprese salad looks SO good. I love those. And I love your line: “I walk this earth like the light I am, but I see all its darkness.” Beautiful and haunting. Sounds like a perfect first line for a novel! Jot it down somewhere else and keep it safe. You might want to use it some day. 🙂
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Me too, thanks 😛 I grow everything but the mozzarella, but my tomato crop was sad this year.
Thank you so much, I tweeted the line. I’m glad you liked it.
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Good, now no one can steal it from you! (But they probably still will. There’s that darkness…)
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Ahaha, yep!
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What, you don’t grow your own mozzarella? Pfft…slacker 😉
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Hot & heavy is the name of the game here too, lately. Wake me in winter, or whenever She decides what She wants, whichever comes first, will ya? 😉
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Oh She. *sigh*
I just wanna wake up to snow on the ground. ❤
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I love Fridays… wait, I love any day of the week that has the word day in it!!
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Each one is a gift 🙂
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Start writing. That should cure one problem.
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We had a glorious run of about 8 days with highs in the low-80’s. Now it’s back to ball-sweat 90’s and I am more the despondent for it. Oh weather, you wicked wicked tease….
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Oh God yes, write it!!!
P.S. Weather here is the same as what you’re getting. Stupidly hot.
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“… mashing potatoes with the family members who abused them.” Best summation of Thanksgiving & Christmas I’ve read in ages. It’s hot here as well. I might need to stay inside over the weekend and write a novel, too.
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Thanks 🙂 You should. You know what would be a real perk about your books, Ally? Impeccable spelling and grammar, every time. So rare these days.
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Thank you.
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Happy Friday Joey!! We have had a hot day here too today, although not as warm as you have it! I think we are having a last gasp at summer.
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Maybe. I’m gasping, that’s fersure! 😛
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HAHA! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
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Really a great read. I agree to many things in this post. Here at our side we are enjoying the start of this winter breeze with some latte and of course with your amazing blog. Hope you have a great time .
Will glad to have you at my site and your words at my latest post. Thanks. Happy weekend
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Thank you 🙂
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That was the best post I’ve read in a long time. Nice work, and I hope it cools off for you. Make sure the margaritas are extra cold.
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Thank you very much 😀
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I’d buy that book.
Seriously though, despite the constant blathering and white noise that has replaced thoughtful discussion and debate, there’s always reasons to be hopeful. Your list is a good place to start. Enjoy your weekend and stay cool.
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Thanks, Norm 🙂
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Great insight and writing, Joey. Your definition of what it’s like to live in America is spot on—humorous, ironic, and sad. Your post puts me in mind of the song, Ants Marching by Dave Matthews Band.
Thankfully, there’s the weekend and tequila. Enjoy!! 🙂🍹
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I do NOT mind reminding you of Dave Matthews lyrics 🙂 Thanks so much!
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You knew I would like this, didn’t you? Back atcha:
“You were the moon. // All this time. And he was always there for you // to make you shine.” // “Was he the sun?” // “No, honey, // he was the darkness.”
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LOVELY. ❤ Thanks.
I didn't know you'd like it, but I did know you'd get it, and that's enough sometimes.
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Whoa !! I need to catch my breath after this one. So many layers here. Shag carpet and Pink Floyd. Shards of colored glass in that chicken soup. Sex and love, with more tattoos. My favorite is about mashing those holiday potatoes. OMG. What did you have/ not have for breakfast today, Joey ? Or is the heat just getting to you on this first day of “Autumn”. In any case, this is one of your best entries ever into this WP thing. Well done. I appreciate you.
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Thank you very much 🙂
I ate pineapple and cottage cheese for brekkie. lol
I don’t like the heat, it really doesn’t agree with me. Especially after weeks of open windows, and now the outdoor pool is closed, but it’s hot enough to want it.
But mostly, I see people around me, REALLY see them, and their struggles.
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The struggles are so very real. Good on you to notice them.
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‘I walk this earth like the light I am’–darn, Joey! Why have I never walked this way? Oh, that leaf–killer red lipstick.
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I dunno, Lois. Surely you’re a light, I see it even when you don’t.
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Joey–you are a very special person.
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❤ Thank you.
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I heard the end of the world was starting tomorrow according to some planets and stars aligning in Virgo and the book of Revelation or some shit like that. So that’s just greaaaaat aint it?! This weather IS unholy, but I’m not letting it stop me – I’m going to Renfest tomorrow even though I’m gonna sweat my ass off in my costume, but dammit I’m gonna have fun anyways! So there! 😛
Enjoy your Pink Floyd! 🙂
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I hope you have a magnificent time! Surely there will be some shade and some fine ale! 🙂
I did not know the world ends tomorrow, but if it does, I shall miss the snow.
Thanks, Jewels! x
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This is amazing. Your words hit me. Every time. Thank you.
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Thank you!
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Damn Lady that roller coaster ride of words wore me out. If it were later I would take a scotch and soda and take a nap. But since I just woke up I will just take a brandy and coffee and bake some stuff. Excellent job and such nice word weaving.
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Thank you very much! Whatcha bakin? Gonna post photos? 😛
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Well a raisin cake and some chocolate chip cookies. If I can get Instagram to co-operate I will post some pics.
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🙂
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“I am loved and so are you.” Yup. Many times over. With all of the crap that goes on in the world, I always have the love of friends and family. Can’t put a price on that.
But I can put a price on adult refreshment. Is the brandy on sale too?
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I dunno, I hope so 🙂
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I’m lingering on the image of rabid chickens running around in orange and green shards of glass shaped like carrots and celery while my insurance has always paid for 50% of each therapy session, so I’d have to save up money for holiday therapy. But thank God for good art, flirting leaves and that we are loved.
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Indeed. Gotta take the bright spots where you can.
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I think you’ve just begun the great American novel and of course it would be a dark comedy. Love the flirting leaf. . .
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I just finished reading “A Canticle for Liebowitz” this morning and this post goes nicely, nicely with it, although yours post is definitely more optimistic. You sure can write, Joey.
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Thank you so much, Susanne!
I’ve not read that book — should I?
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Its a post-nuclear apocalypse novel that spans 18 centuries and is suprisingly only 334 pages long. Its beautifully written and very scary because, you know, current events. Whether to read it or not depends on your stomach for being scared out of your wits.
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Ah. Maybe a PDF or a library loan then. Thanks!
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YES, you should read it. One of my favorite books. The fact that I do find it optimistic speaks volumes about why I call myself MomGoth.
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Okay!
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Bahhah. Reading that book, sign me up.
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We’re never too optimistic! It’s already happy hour somewhere else. To go with your list 🙂
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Best. Post. Ever. Copying it and saving it to read for as long as, you know, whatever.
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❤ ❤ ❤ Thank you!!! I shall glow all the livelong day.
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I’m with Norm, I’d buy tat book. I still say “The Book of Joey” was lost from the Bible. Maybe on purpose so we’d end up with a world that has things like the weather channel. It’s 90° her, too and I’m not happy. The dog’s not happy. The wife is not happy. I am loved, though. The dog knows I’ll walk her when it’s cool. The wife knows the AC is still working. I know where to find a cold beer.
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Sometimes you compliment me so big, I struggle to find the words to say thank you in appropriate measure. Thank you.
Sadie’s not happy, either. Thankful for AC! It’s going to cool back down late in the coming week, THEY SAY.
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The days are perfect here at the moment but evening and mornings are down right cold! I put the heater the last two mornings.
Was it your birthday week-end? I sure hope you got some margaritas, and Happy Belated Birthday if it was! I hope it cools down for you this week, and the weather is perfect.
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I suspect your cold is my good weather. It’s supposed to be cooled off by Thursday. It should be cool on my birthday, because it’s late November 🙂
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Enjoying life is all in the mind. Some days it is a positive place and some days not so much. But, I can only be on social media for a few minutes before I remember why I only stay on there for a few minutes. The average human is ranting and raving about something and by the time you scroll through 500 of your closest friends, you are stark raving mad about a variety of topics. So, I watch the news once a day, listen to my own choice of music, and check in with my blogging friends who all have something interesting to say about life but are upbeat about it. Thank you, my fellow bloggers, and this post is a perfect example. 🙂
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Haha, so true! I appreciate your appreciation and your candor on the topic.
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That’s a great cheer up list! Winter IS coming…but I’m hoping fall stays a bit….or actually shows up!
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Me too, Amy, me too. Let this not be the year fall is a no-show! And thanks 🙂
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Write that book and make sure to autograph my copy. I’d read the hell out of that.
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🙂
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