The other day, I was behind a big black SUV at the stoplight, and I noticed the driver stuck an I Heart Guns bumper sticker on it and it made me wonder what do I Heart enough to advertise it on my vehicle?
Truth: I own ONE bumper sticker. It’s this:
I’ve had it more than twenty years, never actually put it on a car. That’s like six different stories and they’re more like drinkin-on-the-porch stories, not blog stories, so you’ll not read those here.
For a long time, I had an alumni bumper sticker on my car. I almost got an alumni license plate, but ultimately I chose the Marine Corps plate, because I believe it’s an advantageous sorta license plate, whereas the alumni plate might, at best, have people rolling down their windows and shouting “Chirp Chirp!” at me.
When you finish college, there’s this sorta overwhelming need to let everyone know you’re done with that now. The newness wears off and people ask terrible questions like, “When ya gonna go to grad school?”
But Hearting things.
I see this stuff all the time. You do too, I bet.
I Heart My Wife, My Husband, My Dog, My Cat, My Kid. well good, ya should. To me, if you’re puttin it out there on your car, you’re like, “This is what you need to know about me, Total Stranger In Traffic: I Heart Guns.”
I couldn’t do that one. I don’t Heart Guns. I’m ambivalent at best. Recoil very bang.
But what DO I Heart? And better, do I Heart anything so significantly interesting and unique that I want everyone to know this about me, like an ad for me, before I even step out of my car?
I Heart my blog. I Heart sleeping in. I Heart yellow. I Heart ice cream, quilts, baths, Coca-fucking-Cola. I Heart precipitation, no, wait, not hail. I Heart doors. I Heart Batman. I Heart cardigans. I Heart a lot of things. I do. I just don’t know at what level I would need to Heart something to advertise it.
Gun to my head, if I had to choose a Heart for Blanche, I’d probably choose I Heart My Solitude or I Heart Singing In My Car or I Heart Arriving Safely.
What do y’all Heart?
HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!