SoCS – Foiled

More than a moon ago, Sassy treated me to a pedicure.

She was feeling generous and doting to Mimom, so we got ‘gels’ on our toes.
My goodness, they were so shiny. I marveled at them a month later, so shiny, no chips. That was in the shower. In the harsh sunlight, looked a lil worse for wear, and I thought I should probably add toes to my Sunday Night Beauty Control Ritual.

Sundays passed. I’m a busy woman.

Sassy had an event to go to, and she had this elegant dress with the beading and the cut-outs and the shine of chiffon. Sort of a berry-garnet kinda color. With which she wore silver and rhinestone sandals, all so ladylike and lovely — down to her BRIGHT CRAYOLA YELLOW toenails. Because, gel polish does not swipe off with acetone like other polish.

I DID NOT KNOW THIS.

Some Googling later, I was at my child’s feet with foil and acetone and cotton, per the YouTube tutorial. Fail. Nope. No go. Off she went to dance, gorgeous from her head to her metatarsals.

So last weekend, we got up EARLY on a bleedin Saturday, to get into the salon and fix our toenails. Ugh. We went to a nearby place which will probably be my place now. (We’ve been to many places since we moved ‘home’ and we no likey any til now.)

The salon ladies put us in the motion sickness chairs massage recliners and liberally poured the acetone over our toesies and covered them with enough cotton to dam a creek. Then they drowned the cotton in more acetone, wrapped our feet in foil, and left us there to watch a series of cooking shows where people were not Italian. We shared tongue-clucks and snarled lips. The ladies came back and unwrapped our foils, revealing cracked, melted gels and the ashiest feet you’ve ever seen. Then they blasted us with a Dremel tool and lubricated our skin. NO GEL. At one point, I turned to Sassy to exclaim about the horror of mixing whipped cream cheese with jarred gravy and she was not there and I shouted, “Where’s the baby?!” how I do.
This made the salon ladies laugh, because probably all moms of every language and culture know the blanched panic face and darting eyes expression of “Where’s the baby?!” I’m sure it’s universal.
Fortunately, the baby was already seated at a dryer.

socsnow

Stream of Consciousness Saturday — SoCS ‘wrap/rap’ is brought to you by LindaGHill

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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40 Responses to SoCS – Foiled

  1. Bill says:

    And that baby thing (dads too) goes on forever. 20s, 30s, 40s, and I should live so long. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Laura says:

    I was talked into my first (and last) set of gel toes in July. We were traveling twice that month and I didn’t want to deal with chips or repainting or any of that jazz. NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT THE GEL DAMAGE EITHER. Because I’m stubborn or something I refused to go back to a salon to have them remove the mother effing paint they’d put on in the first place so six weeks later I peeled the darn things off myself. Let’s just say it’ll probably take six months for my toenails to look normal again. Sigh.

    Liked by 2 people

    • joey says:

      Oh Laura, I’m sorry you found out the hard way too! And then did it the hard way, oof! I was indignant when I found out. How had I missed this important information?!?! I felt so… betrayed, deceived, duped! But now I know.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Rivergirl says:

    I wonder if paint thinner and a scraper tool would have worked? Yikes!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Benson says:

    Huh. Have you considered a palm sander?

    Liked by 1 person

  5. markbialczak says:

    My biggest surprise at my one (and only so far) pedicure was how the BOCES student selected by my dear wife Karen carefully filed my toe nails. No clippers. What did I know, Joey? No gel that I recall, just a coat of polish.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. AmyRose🌹 says:

    Oh my goodness! Sounds like a nightmare! No way would I put gel on my nails. Good to know ya finally got that color off. I hope your poor skin is all right.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Ally Bean says:

    Great story. I knew that getting those gel colors off was a bother, but not quite how much of a bother. I take it you found the baby, as it were… and will not be doing the gel pedicure again?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Thanks for the warning. I promise never to get gel colors on my toes.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. marianallen says:

    OMG, I did the thing, too! Didn’t I warn you? Didn’t I? Didn’t I tell you how the thing wouldn’t come off??? Oh, yeah, my thing was the powder dip, not the gel. I didn’t know the gel was also evil. I’m still painting my fingernails (not the toes, THE FINGERS) to conceal the damage. Another couple of months, and they’ll look like regular fingernails again. I’m learning to fancy them myself. WITH NO GEL!

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      Oh no! I had no idea. Yeah, I did the acrylics for years upon years. The whole time I taught, all the way through the baby daze, and it took about 6 months to heal when I stopped. There’s something marvelous about having regular salon dates, but I can’t be that dependent on services these days. It’s hard enough to put an hour in at home.
      I’m glad you’re learning to fancy them yourself. I did notice you had begun polishing regularly, a skill you said you did not possess….practice makes perfect 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  10. scr4pl80 says:

    Thanks for the warning although I must say I’ve never painted my toenails at all. Rarely my fingernails unless my own nails are long, which they can get to be depending on how much work I do. At least you’ve had two “play dates” with your baby AND a blog post out of the experience 🙂 Happy Sunday!

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      Happy Sunday to you and your naked toes! In the winter, I put a little shimmery light pink on them and give them a rest, but I don’t know who I am with naked toes.
      Yes, bonding time with Sassy at the salon is fab 🙂 HAVING to go back unexpectedly, totally not fab.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. I have an excuse to trim my nails very short: I’m a touch typist, properly taught at fifteen to use the tips of my fingers on a buckling-spring (IBM Selectric-type) keyboard – and my fingers look weird with polish. Weird, to me.

    When I go on vacation, I sometimes just skip a fingernail trim or two, and voilà! Pretty. And then I’ll do the toenails too, for fun.

    After this post, there will never be gels on my digits. Thanks! Except for the Academy Award acceptance speech for best screenwriter or screenplay, which is highly unlikely.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      One cannot beat the lasting shine — certainly amplifies stage presence 😀
      I suppose I keep my nails mid-length, polished or not, but I always have color on my toes.
      I am also a touch typist, and do the QWERTY well, but not the others. I own my mother’s Royal, but never use it.

      Like

  12. JT Twissel says:

    Cream cheese with canned gravy! That about captures the terror.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Anxious Mom says:

    Fun times! I got gel once a few years ago. I removed it at home, and omg, such a bitch. Never again. I ended up using a knife to scrape that shit off and my nails looked awful, as you can imagine, until they grew out.

    Like

  14. puppy1952 says:

    No matter what age they reach, they’re still our babies😁

    Like

  15. kirizar says:

    I’ve never tried the ‘gels’ mostly because I’m too cheap and I figure I destroy all nail polish one way or another. But sometimes, it is nice to do the girly thing and get gussied up. So, one can be torn between beauty and the beastly consequences of nail care!

    Like

  16. Joanne Sisco says:

    I’m glad I’ve never succumbed to the siren call of gels 😳

    Like

  17. bikerchick57 says:

    You made me very glad that I paint my own toenails. It’s hard enough to get the glittery polish off, so I can’t imagine with gel…

    Like

  18. Jewels says:

    Toxic shit that gel stuff!

    Like

  19. Prior... says:

    so now we all know – thanks!!
    although that yellow does sound pretty for a while and for the right things – eh?

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Dan Antion says:

    I am dredging my way through the past, missed posts. I’m deleting a bunch, but I had to read this. Now I can go to bed after a good laugh – thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Amy says:

    I haven’t tried gel and now I know that I never will!!

    Liked by 1 person

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