Double Standards

“Wanna go to bed early?” The Mister asked me.
I looked at the clock and said, “Sure, but not THIS early.”
His eyes hardened.
I rolled my eyes, shifted my voice up a few octaves and faked a smile. With fluttering lashes I nodded. “Yes, but later please.” Ever indignant, I added,Β “I dunno why I gotta talk sweet to you. You not talk sweet to me.”

That’s some sexist shit, right there.

“It’s because I have a penis.”
“Well then I will wear a strap-on and talk as I like.”

And then how he laughed and laughed!

Happy Friday Everyone!



About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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32 Responses to Double Standards

  1. loisajay says:

    You so crazy! Have a good one, Joey.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. orbthefirst says:

    Having my Other ask me if Id like to go to bed “early” with them sounds pretty sweet to me. πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  3. marianallen says:

    I laughed and laughed, too. πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  4. JoAnna says:

    I’m reminded of a picture I saw yesterday about sexual intimacy. (No, it was not a strap on.) It was a panel with buttons with on/off switches. The top half was for males and had one simple on/off switch in the center. The bottom half of the panel was for females. There were about twenty different buttons and knobs of all shapes and sizes with various settings. Yep. That’s right, I said.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Dan Antion says:

    I’m just gonna leave it at having pressed the like button…moving away slowly now.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. bikerchick57 says:

    You can say what you want, Joey, regardless if a 9″ plastic tube is strapped around your waist or not. πŸ˜›

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Y’all seem to laugh a lot together! In my opinion, it’s chemistry like yours that makes a relationship work well. Enjoy your weekend! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Alice says:

    When shopping for your strap-on, might I suggest looking for one with some glitter in its silicone? Phallic empowerment is always more fun with a dash of pretty! #notsayingthiscuzyoureagirl #wannabesuperclearonthatpoint #cisdudeswishtheycouldhaveglittertoo #prettyisforEVERYONE

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Hilarious. That made me laugh as well !

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Hard to argue with that logic (bad pun intended).

    Liked by 1 person

  11. pluviolover says:

    Him, “I love you. I brought you flowers, and I want to go to bed early and make hot love with you all night.”
    Her, “Why are you being so damn nice to me, and what’s her name?”

    (β€œHere’s all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.” ~ George Carlin)

    Liked by 1 person

  12. larva225 says:

    Damn. Maybe I need a strap-on so that when I say that I want to go to bed early (and nicely at that!) I won’t catch hell. We’re adults. Why can’t we go to bed if we want to or not????

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Prajakta says:

    Ha ha ha πŸ˜€ I need to remember that one…

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Thanks for the great laugh! Hubby doesn’t like to go to bed without me so I always go to bed much earlier than my night owl self would like.

    Liked by 1 person

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