I’m typing this on my phone. Can you imagine my horror? I know some of you do this all the time and you are not me. I hate the phone keyboard. I have tiny hands and itty bitty fingers and still I’m not good at it.
Last week I was texting and it changed “Such a problem” to “Suck it Pepe” and that is not okay, cause I am not all about turnin a polite conversation into a pile o drama. That is to say, I pretty much hate texting so if I text you, I really care about you, but also, will likely be brief and not try to engage you in sucking convo of any sort.
Anyway, my keyboard is massively fucked up. I cannot word on it at all. No wording allowed. If I were super committed I could type and delete away all the extra letters, alas, I have less patience for that than I do for typing this post via text.
I tried many Google suggestions and asked my brilliant son and drove my family to the edge of exasperation before attempting a failed recovery and as I type this, I’m resetting. This lappy is only three years old. I will be upset if I have to buy a new lappy.
My road has been bumpy lately. Mind you, all the things that are truly important are fine and I am oh so grateful. However, it’s gettin … it’s kind of … I could write me a lil country music tune.
Someone wrote me a big bad check. I’ll be bloggin the fuck out of that when it’s all set right. Who knows when that will be. They’re sending a new check and second chances are good, right? Why, it’s prolly in the mail right now!
I tried to get sick. I had the swollen glands and I couldn’t brain and I kept lookin at the same papers over and over but my brain didn’t care to take in any more info so I hadda go home and sleep for 30 hours and pop Lysine and NSAIDS like candy so I didn’t get the fever and my face didn’t explode, but it was a rough coupla days there.
My yellow handbag broke. I wrote about that, but haven’t thrust it upon you yet.
I got a serious paper cut, but I made it through somehow. I’m okay as long as they don’t bleed. There aren’t always the right Band-Aids around — the ones I’m NOT allergic to. (I’m extra special, okay?)
The riding mower broke and the replacement part came but…
Our old red van died. We dunno why she died. She’s sittin there waitin for The Mister to do stuff. I dunno the stuff. I do know that prayer healed my in-laws’ old red van. It sat dead there on the street for years and one day she started and ran for another two years. I reckon she needed a rest.
It’s new car time, but no one has time to go get a new car or heal the old red van or deal with banks or get sick or fix the mower or find a new handbag because the kids are doin all the things. All the things. Tonight was the last of the night things and then there are trip things until the summer things start with the away things and camp things — simply all the things. I was gonna write you a funny about that, but I can’t cause this phone format doesn’t meet my needs.
So anyway, again, bumpy road lately.
In the midst of my bumpy road journey I have encountered some inspiring support and generosity. Small kindnesses. Big kindnesses.
But of course my keyboard is jacked. Otherwise it wouldn’t blend into this shitshow I’m workin on over here.
It can’t last forever. Nothing does. Not even old red vans.
It’s at times like these I appreciate every single thing that goes right. Like the other night I got some spicy chili chicken on my white tee shirt but it was okay, cause spicy chili chicken in my mouth.
Found out my dog has allergies which is better than findin out she’s got anything else. Like her people, she can take pills and still live a full and happy life.
Resetting a computer takes a long time. It’s only at 40%. I’m at about 20% and think I should stop rambling and go to bed.
Cheers to the long weekend!