Random Musings of the Unamused

I’m kinda feisty lately.

My spidey-senses are keen. My bullshit threshold is low, as is my ability to give fucks. My eye rolls are exceptional.

almost as good as lucille's

almost as good as lucille’s

It’s likely related to hormones, because I also think Cocoa Krispies are incredible and I think it would be fun to have a party where everyone brings mashed potatoes and a different kind of gravy…

good gravy!

good gravy!

 

Or maybe not a party. Maybe everyone could simply place the mash and gravy upon the porch, like an offering to the grumpy goddess, and back away slowly.

look, i'm not the first person to think of it

look, i’m not the first person to think of it

People should not arrive at my house at 9am without notice.

ferreal

ferreal

 

Have I ever mentioned how nice it is that the front of the house and the back of the house are largely soundproof from one another? True. Can’t hear the house phone or the doorbell from the bedrooms.
Sorry, not sorry.

you rang?

you rang?

If you can wake us up from the front of the house, you’ll prolly wake the whole neighborhood and the police, so be sure to bring LOTSA coffee, mk?

I kinda hate holidays. All you people suddenly want strawberries and tomatoes for your holiday food, when in reality, the rest of us buy them all the damn time, and we do not appreciate your holiday zeal.

some of us just eat the fruit, without artistic or patriotic demonstration you know

some of us just eat the fruit, without artistic or patriotic demonstration you know

Moo doesn’t want homemade chicken & noodles tonight. She made herself some ramen, and then proceeded to tell me WHY she doesn’t like homemade chicken & noodles. I’m not sure I like her anymore…

i will eat all my chickynoonoo like a good girl

i will eat all my chickynoonoo like a good girl

The Mister has worked a terrible shift this weekend. 0430-1730. Isn’t that rotten?!?
It’s particularly rotten when you’re a one-car family and Simon is graduating three hours away.

yay simon!

yay simon!

My hair looks good.

I think I’ll go make myself a cocktail.

I’ll take a picture for you.
Not of the hair. The cocktail.

yeah, i sipped before i clicked

yeah, i sipped before i clicked, can you blame me? non

Cheers!

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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35 Responses to Random Musings of the Unamused

  1. meANXIETYme says:

    I don’t even know where to start with this post. Can I go paragraph by paragraph? LOL

    Mostly, ZOMG mashed potatoes and gravy….ALL OF THEM. Yum-mers. I won’t ask you to share, I’ll just ask whoever is dropping them off to please drop off two of everything.

    And that homemade chicken and noodles looks delish! As does the cocktail. What kind is it? It looks like my kinda deal (I *love* kahlua and cream). Again, won’t ask you to share, but now I might hafta go make one of my own. Better yet, kahlua on top of some ice cream.

    Hope your day went quickly and no one bugged the shit out of you. And that you enjoy gettin’ yer drink on.

    Like

    • I made mash potatoes with gravy twice this week. I may make s’more again this week! I am sooooo into gravy right now.
      It’s Kahlua and milk with chocolate syrup on top — it is DIVINE, thanks!

      Like

      • meANXIETYme says:

        YUM for both mashed potatoes and gravy (I can’t make gravy worth shit, wtf is wrong with me?!) AND for Kahlua and milk with chocolate syrup.
        I wish I could eat everything with gravy. I love good gravy. I wish I could make good gravy. Waaah, now I want gravy.

        Like

        • Would you like to read a blog on how to make gravy? What goes wrong with your gravy?

          Like

          • meANXIETYme says:

            I’ll read it, but I’ve seriously read every instruction on how to make gravy. It is either lumpy or tasteless…or both. And I cannot use regular flour because of my gluten issues, and generally we do not use milk if we can help it. We usually use cornstarch to thicken, though we have tried gluten free flour, too.

            Like

            • Try it my friend True’s way? Take your corn starch and water and mix it in a cup before you add it, or use your thickener (whatever isn’t glurten?) and a bit of milk or broth in a cup or bowl before you add it? I get the silkiest gravy from her milk and flour in a bowl method, but I also use the corn starch like that for sticky teriyaki or lemon caper.

              For years I couldn’t cook rice on a stovetop to save my life. Even now, I sorta pray over it an hope, lol!

              Like

              • meANXIETYme says:

                Too funny! That’s what I do…I have a little container that I put water and cornstarch in and I mix them together to make sure there are no lumps, then I add it slowly to the gravy to thicken. Sometimes it works okay, sometimes it gets lumpy. I think it might be the heat…like it’s on too high?

                We got a rice cooker…works wonders! 🙂

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  2. Dan Antion says:

    Congrats to the grad. And, that chicken looks great and I love noodles. I also love mashed potatoes and gravy. I’m hungry.

    Like

  3. LindaGHill says:

    Right there with the hormone thing.
    *goes to pour glass of wine*
    Cheers, my dear.

    Like

  4. words4jp says:

    The chicken and noodles looks devine.

    Like

  5. Lol that was very funny you sound like me not wanting to be disturbed and the potatoes was well whacky haha and I love that! Well done for entertaining a tored person x

    Like

  6. meg68 says:

    The Hormones! Oh the humanity!
    Food is good, and why can’t I have chocolate cake for breakfast?

    Like

  7. Q: “OMGWHYDOTHEHORMONESHAVETHISMUCHCONTROLOVERUS?”
    A: Otherwise, we’d rule the world, and can’t have that happen, can we?

    Like

  8. Snoring Dog Studio says:

    What a wonderful post – filled with on target sentiments! Yay You! I want your chicken and noodles recipe! That looks delicious! The only people who can come to my home in the morning are my family members. My mom had me hang a cute little welcome sign on our front door. It is really sending the wrong message. I want to get a welcome mat that says, “Stay the hell away.” And then watch people from the peep hole try to decide what to do.

    Like

    • Yeah, “Welcome” is not the right message for front doors…
      Don’t think you need a recipe, really. Roast chicken, eat chicken, save remaining chicken in a big bag in the fridge for a day or two, boil carcass, drain drippings, add bouillon and water, drop in noodles, add herbs and a pile of salt, add chicken bits — voila!

      Like

  9. Sherry says:

    I’ll just tiptoe on outta here…Seems you’re having a “thing”…lol…happy holiday hows ever ya celebrate…just the usual crap for us…ribs, some brats, potato salad…all ready to go…kinda overcast today here…unusual, but nice…

    Like

  10. Jewels says:

    Ah hormones…. such wonderful things. Not. I’ve been riding the hormonal wave all weekend. Thanks for making me laugh once again Joey, you’re even funnier when you’re feisty! 😉

    Like

  11. Patti Hall says:

    Hysterical laughter here. When I tap my ruby red slippers together I will be you! I will eat and drink what I want. I will say what the f I want to say. Meanwhile, I will get my butt over and write a nice Memoir Monday and try to do better at pretending I am human before noon 🙂
    I want to live here. I want to fund you. Alas, can’t do either!
    Hugs,
    P

    Like

  12. suzjones says:

    Yum for the Kahlua and milk (one of my favourites). I would love to say that I laughed through your whole post but I don’t think you’d be amused by that 😉

    Like

  13. I wrote it to be funny, so yes, thanks 🙂

    Like

  14. Kat's Den says:

    Congratulations to the graduate! As to the mash and gravy, I always order the gravy on the side when I’m out. Not because I don’t like gravy, or because of any weight conscious thing — I just always remember that one time I was someplace and the gravy was awful. It’s not easy like picking olives off of pizza. It’s incredibly hard to get bad gravy off of good mashed potatoes.

    Like

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