In Your Face, Me!

I let my husband drive my car once a week.
You read that right.
I LET him drive MY car.

Whatever. Yes, I’m a bitch. If you’re not one of the 12 people who knows my life, you’re really not qualified to judge this car issue.

So anyway, a few weeks ago, I was drivin Bonnie Blue around, doin some errands, and I realized that the thingamabobber said I had like 20 miles of fuel left. I thought I’d be nice and fill her up before The Mister took her the following day. He always fills up my car, because I’m a bad feminist and he spoils me.

I knew he’d appreciate a full fuel tank. Plus, I could pick up some ice. It’d be two fewer things for him to do, and I wanted to perform this kindness. Because, you know, doing things for him makes me seem romantic, which I am not, but his love language is what’s important here.

So I stopped at the gas station. There was a line. Moo said stuff about how she thought I was doing it wrong, but in typical Moo fashion, she didn’t have the right words to convey her knowledge. Like any other self-righteous mother would, I reminded her I had a car before, y’know. And also, for all the time her daddy was gone, I filled my minivan up just fine, y’know.
I waited for a very long time to get to the pump. Then I got out, only to discover the fuel door was on the other side. That’s when I realized what Moo had been tryin to say.
Not one to miss out on being right, Moo said, “I told you!”
“Ah, yes. I see now what you meant.”

I pulled forward to back into the other side, but someone else drove right in and took the spot. Well of course they did. Why wouldn’t they? I mean, I got back in my car and pulled forward. There was no way to signal that I was going to the other pump.

I decided to go park and send Sassy in to get ice. Then I would maneuver back to the pumps, this time on the right side to fill up.

Well, unlike every other place ever, this place doesn’t keep their ice in a chest outside. I watched my child exit the building, walk all around, go back inside, walk around, walk back to the cashier, walk around, and finally, emerge with two bags of ice.

I pulled out of the parking space and went back to the pump. There was another fucking line. I waited another really long time. I chose the worst possible side, because the ones on the other side emptied out faster.

It was uncanny. My timing, my choices — Ugh! Acts of service is like, so much harder than “You look hot in those basketball shorts.”

Eventually, I put gas in Bonnie Blue.

I said to The Mister, “I filled the car up and bought ice so you don’t have to do that tomorrow.”
He thought that was sweet and I got a kiss. GOOOOOOOOOOAL!
Of course Moo wasted no time in telling him how she knew I was doin it wrong.

Then I got a lesson.
I love a good lesson.
The gas gauge actually tells you where your fuel door is.
Did you know that?!?

The Mister said stuff about the side the fuel gauge is on tells you and then he said newer cars have arrows. I was all like, “Wha?!?”

This is Bonnie Blue’s gas gauge


Do you see the arrow?
Pshaw, and I think I’m perceptive.

I had no idea.

Now, I know I don’t know a lot. The more I learn, the more I’m aware of how much I don’t know…But honestly, I’ve developed a small obsession for wondering what else I don’t see, literally, right in front of my face.

Did you know about the secret language of fuel gauges? Have you learned anything completely obvious lately?

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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35 Responses to In Your Face, Me!

  1. I figured that out by renting cars through my work. Every one is different, but little pointer is awesome.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. In your defense (and mine!) …the arrow looks like a handle

    Liked by 1 person

  3. meANXIETYme says:

    I learned about the gas gauge arrow pointy thingy only in the last three or four years. I know how to change the oil in my car, but never knew about the gas gauge thing. LOL
    Hub takes my car to fill the gas tank, too. Sometimes we even go together and I get to sit in the car while he fills both cars. Ain’t love grand? 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Carrie Rubin says:

    I never knew about the arrow either! I just had a rental car in Denver, and when I went to fill it, of course I pulled up on the wrong side. If only I’d know about the arrow. Could’ve saved myself a little time (and a little embarrassment). But I’m spoiled too. Hubs often fills my tank for me. That’s especially lovely in the winter. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Anxious Mom says:

    Hahaha, I learned about that fuel arrow a few years ago. After doing it wrong for a long time. And when I mentioned the revelation to my husband, he acted like I shouldn’t have been allowed to have a license without knowing that.

    Btw, my husband is all about making sure I don’t pump gas, too. It’s so sweet.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. That’s so cool! I never knew that. Maybe because it’s on newer cars… And I think my car came on the market the year after they stopped putting paneling on station wagons.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Ellen Hawley says:

    Well clever car. Mine keeps it a secret.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I did know this. Giggle.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Benson says:

    Yep gas gauges indicate which side the door is. So do Moos.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. I had no idea that they indicated which side the door is on, I will have to check mine now you have mentioned it! Clever Moo knew anyway! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Dan Antion says:

    That’s funny. It was a nice thing you did. I’m guessing Moo knew ‘cuz she goes with dad on those errand-filled rides ??? I can tell you that those are child development moments most women will never understand (all good tho). I did know about the gas gauge and the arrows but I’m the king of learning the obvious. I’ve written about that, the best being when I discovered and announced that “Kanga and Roo are kangaroo-Roos” my very young daughter looked at her mom with that “please tell me I’m adopted” look.

    Liked by 2 people

    • joey says:

      These things happen.
      Yes, I suppose Moo often runs errands with him. We try to do the thing where we both get time alone with each kid, but that Moo, she loves to go bye-bye. lol Also, she’s mad spatial.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. April says:

    I learned the secret of the fuel gauge not too long ago. I learned to drive in a state where pumping your own gas in not allowed. When I moved to another state and had the opportunity to pump my own gas, I didn’t know how—I will never forget the raucous laughing coming from my roommate as she pumped my car full of gas.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      I understand that.
      In college I laughed at people who’d never done things, too. But I wouldn’t now.
      We have two stations on this side of town where they still pump your gas. I hadn’t put gas in my car ever, and I think it’d been a coupla years since I pumped gas at all. And I was amazed at all the gas pump’s chatter. Good gravy, so many questions!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. I did know this. I was trying to tell my humans about the hose being on the correct side, but then we looked at our vehicles and all had the hose on the right and the arrow to the left so I was proved wrong about the hose. But I think it used to be a hose and now it’s the arrow. So funny, at least you got a kiss.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. garym6059 says:

    Learning something new everyday!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Deborah says:

    I have a crazy way of remembering. The gas tank is on the same side that I’m on when I’m driving (and therefore, filling the car). 🙂

    You raise such an interesting point about what else we don’t notice that’s right in front of us. After all, we only have so much conscious attention we can devote to stuff. Surely, there are more important things on our dashboards. And how frustrating is it to find something right in front of us, but only after we’ve been searching and trying to figure it out for ten minutes first? I, for one, appreciate your public service announcement about this indicator — I won’t have to remember which side of the car to sit on anymore. 😉


  16. It wasn’t until I watched The Wire that I figured out that “mos def” means “most definitely.”


  17. Hahahaha. This just cracked me up. My grandpa taught me this a long time ago. I thought it was something everyone knew– certainly my so smart manly hubby. But nope. After sitting with him in line at the gas station while he had to flip my car around not once, but twice, I pointed it out to him. His question? “Is that something Chevy is doing just on this car? Jeep (and everyone else)

    Liked by 1 person

  18. ((Oops..sent before done. ))
    Should jump on board. This is awesome.” I just laughed. I finally knew something about cars he didn’t know! Woot-woot!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. cardamone5 says:

    That’s amazing. I never noticed anything like that, but, then again, my newest car is a 2002 so I doubt it has it (although I’ll check later today.)
    Yes, I miss stuff all the time. Not only that, but I lack that general well of knowledge my husband has because he does things like read newspapers. I tell him, if he were to interview for a job, he’d nail it no problem, because they’d make some off handed reference and he’d get it while I would just miss it. But, that’s why I love him. Well, one of the reasons.


    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      Do check — it’s not always an arrow, sometimes it’s just the fuel gauge is left or right of the wheel, on the side you have the door. (Our 2005 is this way as well.)


  20. meg68 says:

    OMG BaldJake is like Fitty! Please tell me more about all the atoms! Tell me why air ISN’T actually invisible and has weight. ..
    Tell me until my eyeballs bleed and fall onto my cheeks…

    Liked by 1 person

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