You could say the sun shines out of my ass…
But it doesn’t.
I’m just doing one post to accept two awards, because I’m kinda lazy, and also, because I don’t think my readers enjoy award acceptance blogs. Unless the stats lie. Which they do.
Matt, er, Beefy has awarded me the Unshitty Blog Award! Yay me!
Without Beefy, I would probably still be trying to set up this blog, because he was instrumental in how to navigate this site, and extraordinarily kind and gentle during my insatiable need for information when I began. I don’t know if he often deals with crazed women, (his wife is awfully pretty…) but for his help on my part, he should get an award.
(As a totally unrelated perk, he can help you find free porn, or porn-like things if you follow him. I follow him. But not for the porn.
I can find porn on my own. It’s freeing when you’re required to click on free porn links out of a sense of proper blogger etiquette..)
No one wants to write a shitty blog, and no one wants to read a shitty blog, which is why I don’t blog every day, or you would surely be unfollowing me for random posts about how some people get awfully upset when cats pee on not their things, or how I feel about this yet un-blossomed bump on my cupid’s bow, which may be a pimple or a cold sore, but I can’t tell which as of yet. If you are interested in reading random shitty postings like that, you should follow me on Twitter. Hardly anyone does follow me there, but I find it’s a good place to vent shitty shit — which is why hardly anyone does follow me…Endless cycle of readership fail, that.
But, oh, the Unshitty Blog Award, that’s a whole different story. Thank you, Beefy! *smiles brightly*
I don’t want to nominate people for the Unshitty Blog Award, because I don’t read any shitty blogs, and you shouldn’t either. If you’re lookin for unshitty blogs, check out blogs I previously nominated here, here, and here, or the ones I will nominate in a few minutes, because not everyone is as lax about blog award acceptance as Beefy is. Beefy’s pretty laid-back, except when he rants, which is downright hysterical! I could bitch with Beefy all day long.
A stranger from my journey to sanity nominated me for The Sunshine Award. How awesome is that?!
Per the guidelines:
Favorite color? yellow
Favorite animal? giraffe
Favorite number? 4
Favorite non-alcoholic drink? Coca-Cola
Favorite alcoholic drink? I’m moody about alcohol, but if we’re goin all out, it’s tequila.
My Passions? I am passionate about everything in my world? I’m really annoying like that. I may be overly passionate about food, sex, music, films, art, human rights, and words. I don’t give a rat’s ass about golf or tires…
Giving or Receiving Gifts? This is awkward. I’m not really into things, and the things I do like, I’m very, very picky about, to the point where most people should not give me things, or I will make fun of their attempts to gift, here on my blog. Because I am like this, I am a much better giver, and I presume you are also very, very picky, so I am a giver of cash, in general. Sometimes I am wildly thoughtful and give actual things to people, because something was too perfect not to give to them, but it’s rare. I despise compulsory gift-giving, and I despise being the recipient of a compulsory gift. I do not want your thought that counts. I would prefer kind words, a homemade cake, or a donation made in my name. Really.
Here are some unshitty, Sunshine-y Bloggers I’m nominating for the Sunshine Award. You might like to read them. I’m rebelling against hyperlinks, and I’m not listing 10. Omagosh, prolly no one will ever nominate me for a blog award again, because I’m such a rule-breaker today! *rawrs*
If I nominated you for the Sunshine Award, link back to me, answer those questions, nominate ten others, and notify them. Or not. Whatever pleases you.