I went to the store and bought an overflowing cart of groceries.
While I did that, The Mister took the girls to school to pick up their schedules.
I had to push the heavy cart through the store, out of the store, and unload the bags.
He had to fill out paperwork.
We both almost died from the swap of our traditional roles, but it meant we’d have more time as a family later that night.
A great celebration occurred when neither of the girls had been assigned to Ms F– Puckface’s class. Yeah, Puckface, that sounds nicer. Ms Puckface is a wretched teacher. I haven’t actually met the woman, but I’ve discussed her at length with other students and mommies, and her name was often hissed but always cursed unanimously.
I saw her once. I gave her the look.
Because I’m such a positive light bringer, I wished Ms Puckface would find a romantic companion. Perhaps a good pounding would dislodge the corncob from Ms F– Puckface’s ass. I wondered if a monstrously impressive sex toy was a suitable end-of-year gift for her, okay?
I’m only thinking of ways to help.
The girls told their daddy if they’d been assigned to Ms Puckface, I promised them I would demand reassignment. I went all year without meddling, letting my kid buck-up. There will be other bad teachers, but I’m not interested in another year of her particular brand of bullshit. If pressed, I have tales to tell the admin. Oh I have tales. Mmhm.
The Mister said he could take care of her.
Sassy said he could go in first, as the calm one, with the warning.
The Mister said he’d tell her, “You best unfuck yourself and do your job right. I don’t want to send my wife in here. I’m a Marine and I’m scared of her. We’ve been divorced for twelve years, I just haven’t been able to break it to her yet because I don’t know how she’ll react. I don’t wanna die. Please don’t make me send her in here.”
And then we all laughed and laughed.
Happy Friday Everyone!