While the Cookies Bake

Laura nominated me to play along in the Christmas Tag thingy.
Um, Yule. Potato, potahto, latkes, yum! Thank you, Laura!

1.  Which Christmas carol makes you change the radio station in five seconds or less? Which one makes you turn the volume all the way up so you can sing along?

Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer — I hate it. I hated it when I was ten years old. I do not find it funny. It makes me incredibly sad for Grandpa. If a reindeer had trampled my grandmother, someone in my family woulda filled that fucker with buckshot.

White Christmas is probably my favorite one to sing. I regularly annoy my husband with “May your days be merry and briiiiiight” for about a month. Just randomly belting that out. He hates that about me. If it isn’t that one, it’s Angels We Have Heard on High, which is really GLOOO-OOOOO-OOOOOR-RIA, also annoying to husband, but musically more complex, and not as directly optimistic as merry and bright, so a bit more tolerable I suspect.

August Burns Red – Carol of the Bells is to be listened to at full blast. And thou shalt bang thy head.

 

2.  Loose tinsel, garland tinsel, or “hell no, you’re not coming near my tree with that tinsel stuff”?

No. No, thank you.

Oh, on your tree? How festive!

 

3.  What one tradition do you really have to have on Christmas Day for it to feel like Christmas Day?

Bake. I must bake. Baking is my thing.

 

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4.  Have you ever spotted something in, say, March and thought, “Gee, that would be perfect for so-and-so’s Christmas present, I’ll just pick it up.”?

No.

 

 

5.  Have you ever found a Christmas present years later that you bought early then totally forgot about until you were searching for just one more roll of wrapping paper in the back of the storage room?

No, but my dog did months later. I had bought Moo a video game for Christmas, and I had hidden it so well I hid it from myself. The following September, about a week after we got Sadie, she brought me the game in her soft mouth, wagging her tail. I don’t know where she got it or how she knew. It was the damnedest thing. She is a magical beast.

 

6.  Have you ever regifted a present?

Yes. Many nice gifts are nice gifts for someone else.

 

 

7.  Do you have more than one Christmas tree in your home? If so, do you decorate them differently?

Haha! No. Am I livin in The Southwest Virginia Museum? Sorry, that’s what I think of when I imagine Christmas tree heaven. My goodness, I live in a bungalow with three other people, three cats, and a dog. We must all limit our possessions to prevent chaos.

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8.  What food or drink do you associate most strongly with the Christmas season?

It is not Christmas without mini iced sugar cookies. Which I bake.

 

 

9.  What’s the weirdest holiday story you have from childhood?

I will say one funny thing I remember is sitting at the coffee table with my cousins, eating Life Savers, when out of the blue my youngest cousin said, “How to attack birds” and we all laughed because she was learning to read and the book was “How to Attract Birds.” It STILL makes me laugh, mostly because the imagery of my mother attacking birds is absolutely hysterical! If you knew my mother, you’d laugh too. Try that with your own mother. Go ahead. Visualize your mom attacking birds.

 

 

 

10.  Lights – big or small? white or multicolored? blinking or solid?

They’re all good, depending on the overall look. I love the lights. My tree is medium white lights and solid.

 

 

11.  Tree toppers – angel, star, something else?

A five-pointed star, cause pagan heathen Unitarian. It has just occurred to me that an angel holding a wee iced sugar cookie would also be acceptable.

 

 

12.  How do you know when it’s time to take down the decorations?

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I’m not adding questions. Consider yourself tagged or untagged. Have a very merry merry.

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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33 Responses to While the Cookies Bake

  1. Anxious Mom says:

    “someone in my family woulda filled that fucker with buckshot”

    Hahaha, I needed that laugh!

    I am a sucker for the Silent Night Medley. I’m not much of a church-goer (might might be an overstatement, going 2 times in 5 years), but I love Christmas hymnals.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. As always, I had my morning chuckle reading #1 and the buckshot. 🙂 I enjoy Christmas music of all types ‘at’ Christmas not starting the day after Halloween. 🙂 Have a wonderful day with family enjoying those sweet treats.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Dan Antion says:

    “Many nice gifts are nice gifts for someone else.”

    That’s precious!

    Merry Christmas !

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Laura says:

    So many of these answers are the best!! And now you’ve brought upon yourself a story. I DON’T HAVE TO IMAGINE MY MOTHER ATTACKING BIRDS BECAUSE I’VE SEEN IT WITH MY OWN TWO EYES!!

    We had this Siamese cat who would get trapped at the back of the backyard and just yowl for help. He was afraid to cross back to the house because there were some MEAN birds (mockingbirds? or maybe just a mama with a nest?) in the trees back there and they’d dive-bomb him — omg, I’m dying just picturing it. So my mom would make me go out there with her to scoop up the cat while she carried a broom to fight off any birds that attacked. My mom was pretty bad ass like that.

    And you don’t need tinsel, your tree is gorgeous! You do that really pretty wide ribbon thing that I love but have never tried…maybe next year…Merry Christmas!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. marianallen says:

    Epiphany is right! The Twelve Days of Christmas are AFTER Christmas, leading up to Epiphany. Song I turn off: The Little Drummer Boy. Ick. Song I want to belt out: YES, Angels We Have Heard On High wif no breathing in the Gloooooooooooooooooooria! (I call it Jesus On The Banana Boat, though, because DEO.)

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Benson says:

    I am with you on that Grandma song. Don’t hate just can’t like it. Wow that August Burns Red rendition of Carol of the Bells is something else. I have not heard it before. Surely it must be the Christmas Anthem for meth heads. I like any carol sung by Nat King Cole. The only baking I do Christmas day is cake. I used to bake cookies leading up to it. We used to have a small pink Barbie tree for the cats but not this year. I used to love tinsel on my trees. You would find that shit for months after the tree was taken out. Good times. Merry Christmas Joey and Fam.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      We are all meth-free and that is our family favorite Christmas song 🙂
      Cats and tinsels are trouble, but I do love the sparkles!
      It was a very merry day and I hope the same is true for you!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. markbialczak says:

    May you and the fam have a great dang Christmas day, Joey.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. John Holton says:

    Merry Christmas, Joey! Yes, tinsel wreaks havoc on the feline digestive system…

    Liked by 1 person

  9. ghostmmnc says:

    Beautiful tree, great music, and hope all is well at your cozy Christmas house! Merry Christmas! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I’m glad you got tagged for this; funniest Christmas Day post that I’ve seen, must be those sugar cookies! Christmas must be a riot at your house; if not, just start singing, again! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Hope you had a wonderful time. Never thought about it before, but I reserve my buckshot for the song Feliz Navidad. I think it’s the guy’s nasal tone or something.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. larva225 says:

    I’ll bet you’re the best person in the world to White Elephant with!!! Hope y’all’s Xmas was fabulous!!

    Like

  13. Do you know I studied piano for 13 years…3 years past my goal to be a pianist and I suck? Really suck. Baby Girl heard me trying to play the Carol of the Bells in year two or three and sat down at my piano without any piano music…she was flutist then and played the whole damn song. The whole song by ear!! I was just this …close to quitting piano. My GOD she had my Mother’s talent!
    The most infuriating thing…she wouldn’t take piano lessons.

    I can’t think of one Christmas Carol that makes me turn the channel after 5 seconds. I love them all. I even like Grandma Got run over by a reindeer. It’s ridiculous! I think it’s the twang that gets me laughing. I can hear him singing it now.

    The one thing on Christmas Day that makes it Christmas…Family and Stockings. I LOVE my stocking. We always got to have our stocking first no matter time we woke up. The stocking was fair game and there was always a little present in it along with nuts, an orange, and candy. I kept that tradition with my children.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      I can play several instruments NOT WELL and I’m not being humble. I mean it, NOT WELL. Had lessons, classes, mmhm. I can sing. That’s it. Sing. Sigh. I, too, am surrounded by the musically gifted. I am so jealous and sometimes gobsmacked at what musical people I live with.
      If I put oranges in my kids’ stockings they might smile politely now, but when they were younger, they would have been like, “This bad. No likey.” LOL And nuts — they don’t like nuts. I’ve raised weirdos, Deborah! But they can jam 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  14. JT Twissel says:

    Hope your family had a great Christmas Joey! I can’t stand Alvin and Chipmucks singing anything. And Christmas isn’t Christmas without waffles and champagne.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Amy says:

    Interestingly I always keep the tree up until after the New Year, but I hadn’t heard of Epiphany. I googled it and that’s when my decorations will be coming down. Mmm…baking!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Pingback: “Carol of the Bells is to be listened to at full blast. And thou shalt bang thy head.” – Riddle from the Middle

  17. reocochran says:

    I love your tree and your cookies. I want to hug your dogs and watch your kitties. I am happy I stopped by to read your Christmas answers. It feels like I had a visit with my friend Joey!
    Glad you are relaxing and hope you have lots of Fun and merriment! 🤗 😍

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Joanne Sisco says:

    Yeah – I’m a week late, but ….

    #2 – made me laugh out loud!
    #11 – I prefer my tree without a top … but that might be just because we always manage to get a tree that touches the ceiling and there is no room for anything else. This year, we had to chop off a few inches to make it fit. In other words – it was perfect 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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