The Purple Monkeys in the Trees

The ramblings of children, while often entertaining, can be exhausting. Of course, I was an exceptional child and all the things I had to say were breathtakingly interesting and important, and I wanted my parents to listen. I would begin, “Did you see the purple monkeys in the trees?” and if they said no, then I assumed they were engaged and I continued. If they affirmed they had seen the purple monkeys in the trees, I would return at another time.

By the by, kids, you cannot do this with grandparents. They are playful and will talk to you about whether the monkeys might like to join us for supper or help set the table.

Later in life, I’d try the purple monkey ask at sleepovers. Is she really asleep? Should we freeze her bra or put her hand in a glass of lukewarm water? “Did you see the purple monkeys in the trees?”

Now, I pretty much use it exclusively for my husband, who falls in and out of sleep and may or may not know what I’m saying, but responds anyway. He knows this technique, so when he’s less in sleep, he’ll screw up his face and say, “NO!” or “I’m not sleepin!” all grumpy like.

*While you may know about purple monkeys or have them in your area, it’s important you understand that here in Indiana, we do not have any monkeys of any color in our trees.

Tonight, The Mister seemed to be dozing. Sassy turned to me and whispered, “Ask him about the purple monkeys.”

“Y’all see the purple monkeys in the trees today?”
The Mister nodded.
“I thought about pickin some but I’m not sure I have the right kind of vase.”
The Mister nodded.
“Might go on etsy and order a new one, I’ll use PayPal.”
“Text me the amount.”

I wouldn’t want his books to be off. We’ll see how this goes.

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
This entry was posted in Personally and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

51 Responses to The Purple Monkeys in the Trees

  1. Dan Antion says:

    HA! That’s a great technique.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Wow, at least you didn’t freeze his bra.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. Susanne says:

    You made me laugh again.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Well done, Joey, but I must know where you ordered the monkeys from and do they come in different colors? I might be interested in some and we don’t have them in northern Illinois either.


    Liked by 2 people

  5. baldjake70 says:

    It is not nice to speak to the sleeping impaired.

    Liked by 5 people

  6. Funny prank, Joey πŸ˜€

    Liked by 2 people

  7. LOL! You’re brilliant! I may have to borrow this and use this on He-Man.

    I totally get it with Grandparents although mine sadly didn’t live long enough for me to meet them I am one myself and feel the glory and power of it EVERY. DAY! My daughter just chewed me out in a restaurant for not being this kind of Mother when she and her brother were kids.I insisted and won when #1 Grandson wanted to order a Peanut Butter sandwich and french fries at our local BBQ place. Which makes really good BBQ! πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™€οΈ I shrugged and laughed. My job was different then and I’m a retired Mother now.
    Grandparenting ROCKS!!!

    I be seeing those purple monkeys. πŸ₯°

    Liked by 3 people

    • joey says:

      I have seen my parents do such things on countless occasions. It’s shocking initially, thinking we’ve been raised by strangers πŸ˜› Haha! Did Papa turn off golf for Disney? Did Grannette just tell you it’s okay to jump on the patio furniture? Did that just happen?!? Soon enough tho, it makes sense. Parents teach children to be adults. Grandparents enjoy grandchildren. Your daughter has the teaching job now πŸ˜‰ And on the torch passes!


  8. scr4pl80 says:

    Oh that’s a good one. I might try it except I’m afraid it would backfire and they would use it on me! I’ve been known to fall asleep at the drop of a hat and also to pretend to be listening when I’m really typing on the computer πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Maggie says:

    I always told my mom the house was on fire to try and tear her away from her books. I am pretty sure the house was on fire every week for years.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Rivergirl says:

    Why have I never tried this? My husband is always nodding off in front the tv. Purple monkeys it is….

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I’m going to add this to my repertoire… my hearing impaired hubby has gotten very good with his mm-hmms and yes dears to the point that I can no longer tell if he has really heard me or not.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. marianallen says:

    Remind me to stay alert when I’m around you and Sassy. Probably Moo, too. lol

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Benson says:

    We used to have purple monkeys in Indy. Several years ago. You could find them in the Purple Tree Lounge. That was a cocktail bar in a hotel on Meridian Street. They had a piano player. They used to keep the pink elephants company on Saturday nights. Seriously.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Bill says:

    As union rep for hearing impaired hubs, I must point to contract paragraphs regarding random lapses of consciousness and associated deficit audio lapses.
    When our daughter remarried we inherited a set of creative twin step-granddaughters. One learns to listen closely and respond accurately to such wonderful creatures because as they go on and on, their enthusiasm grows and while only one speaks at a time, they can precisely pass any conversation to the other, without warning in mid sentence, with documented evidence for anything. I shall ask if they know of the purple monkeys in trees, or anywhere.
    But yes, we grands have a completely different take on the human condition and discussional priorities.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I’ve had entire conversations with my sleepy spouse that she then denies any recollection of the next morning. It’s both a blessing and a curse. The text message, though…nice touch.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. DGGYST says:

    Too cute! I love all our little secret languages we develop with our partners.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. rvpackard says:

    I’m so curious! Funny you!

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Amy says:

    I need a saying like this! My grandmother used to always say “I’m just resting my eyes” when we were trying to see if she was asleep (thereby freeing us up to do things we shouldn’t). We thought it was so hilarious and that she’d really been asleep. However, now that I’m an adult, I know the saying to be true. lol.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. JT Twissel says:

    I imagine you were a delightful child! My children considered me a huge embarrassment. Doesn’t stop me from swinging with those monkeys though!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. πŸ˜€ It’s so true though, that grandparents will always listen

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Swinged Cat says:

    I like to trick my wife at stoplights sometimes. I’ll say “The light’s purple!” when she isn’t paying attention just to see if she starts to move. It works about 50 percent of the time.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Anxious Mom says:

    Ha! That’s so funny. My husband is bad about the random dozing, too, which I get irritated about when I want to watch a show together. He’ll insist he’s fine, doze, wake, insist he’s fine again, and then want to rewatch it later.

    The purple monkey trick wouldn’t work on LM. He may not answer or seem remotely engaged but if you say, “You aren’t paying attention!” He’ll go “Uh-huh and repeat back the conversation verbatim.” I tell him listening isn’t the same thing as processing and conversing, but tween boys.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Laura says:

    Love it! This is WAY more fun than my most boring “are you asleep?” Will have to kick it up a notch tonight.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. bikerchick57 says:

    LOL! Next time, ask The Mister about the purple people eaters. (a song from long ago)

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Prior... says:

    The text was super fun…

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.