The other day, I walked into the Home Depot, and the door greeter was all, “Good morning! How are you?”
I smiled and said, “It’s just another day, so I’m good, thanks! How’re you?”
She shouted out, “You should be glad to be alive!”
I gave her a look of consternation and went on my way in search of acidic soil amendment.
I don’t know why my answer wasn’t good enough for Door Greeter Lady.
It bothered me. It bothered me all day. What a strange thing to say to someone…
Did I seem suicidal?
Was my smile not working?
Did I present with an expiration date that only she could see?
Had I unknowingly avoided a fatal injury at the door?
Was there a deadly plague in the Home Depot parking lot?
Was she implying that she would’ve killed me in my sleep had she not had other things to do the night before?
I really don’t know what to do with that comment.