Get Up and GO!

At first I wasn’t busy, and then I really, really was. How busy was I? I have been drinking caffeinated soda for over a week! *gasps*

Summer vacation suddenly had too many days with alarm clocks. We kept sayin things like, “We’ll take a nap.” We didn’t. We said things like, “We’ll go to bed early.” We didn’t.

Moo brought home some head lice, which rapidly formed a metropolis on her head. Moo’s head is pretty small, and the lice were forced to expand into the suburbs of other heads in the house. Sassy’s head is much larger, and can provide two feet of curls to hide under. The Mister’s bald and still his head itched. Head lice are psychological terrorists. Does your head itch now? Olive oil days and nit comb nights will not be the highlight of Summer, but the head lice will get their own blog soon.
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Adoption events are held in the morning. You’ll want to get there early.

Cletus the kitten had an upper respiratory infection, so we had to get him some antibiotics and eye drops. It’s not nice to laugh at the suffering of others, but it’s cute and mildly hysterical when tiny kittens sneeze in rapid succession. It’s less cute when you’re picking fleas off of them, so all the cats have to be treated for a few months lest we live in the house of fleas.

Sorry, I just want to make your whole body itch. Apparently.

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Kittens are hard to sleep with, and as it turns out, newly-adopted Como cat might be five, but she acts like a kitten in the night. She also possesses great talent in the I-can-put-all-my-weight-into-one-paw-and-stab-your-internal-organs arena. Como sleeps in the entryway now, behind a chest of drawers, where no one will bother her with any of their adorable purring, drooling, or kneading.

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My parents were in town for awhile. I finally got that walk around the property that I really wanted before we bought the house. My dad kinda knows everything, cause he’s kinda old, and old people are wise. He even knew what the weird black box in ugly laundry room was. A timer. An ancient timer.
I found out that even plant experts like my parents can’t agree on what’s a desirable plant versus an undesirable one. One of my suspected garden weeds is squash, although I didn’t plant any squash seeds. Before they arrived I had been researching “squash-type weeds” and “weeds that look like squash.” Either my tomato seeds were corrupted by squash seeds, or seeds in my compost took the opportunity to sprout. I’m glad those two plants are on the end of the bed, so they have room to sprawl. I’m also glad we love squash and I didn’t accidentally grow beets.
As I feared, I’m gonna hafta dig out all of my ornamental grasses to kill the mulberry seedlings. Bastard mulberries, Man.
Have I ever mentioned my parents wake with the rooster and sleep before nightfall? They do. Without fail. So if you want to have a lengthy visit, you’ll get up at dawn.
We had three wonderful visits, and then my parents returned to the beach. I would prefer that my mother treated our home like sleep-away camp every summer, but it’s like she has a life of her own.

I lost a filling and subsequently broke the tooth, so I had the pleasure of finally finding a new dentist. That tooth had already had a root canal, so the pain was not grueling, but the infection was wearin my whole body down, so I had to get some antibiotics. It’s day three of antibiotics and the lymph nodes behind my ears have already calmed down and my energy has returned. I like to get sick after I go and go and go. It’s my thing.

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Fourth of July parades are held in the morning. If you want to see the parade, you’ve got to drag your ass out of bed and head over before they close the route. Yes, fountain Coke and a bag of pretzels are an excellent choice for breakfast while you wait. Also good? huggin your dog for warmth, cause it was cold in the shade!
We had to have broken a weather record yesterday. It was the coolest Independence Day I can remember. I never even broke a sweat.

sadie
After the parade, we traded Sassy for Ace, but we didn’t really think about how insanely loud Moo and Ace would be after all the parade candy. Duh.

Barbecues with your in-laws are held in the afternoon. If you show up a little late and the food isn’t even on the grill yet, it’s perfectly acceptable to stand behind your hostess’s back and eat an entire peach in five bites. It’s also good manners to join the children on the porch, where you will devour a delicious chocolate cupcake in less than a minute, because littering the patio with black cake crumbs is better than screaming, “I’M FUCKIN HUNGRY, BITCHES!”

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The fireworks are at night, after the sun goes down. It’s not easy to explain the location of your little six-by-six-foot spot in all of downtown Indianapolis. Traffic is crazy. If you don’t know your way around downtown, then traffic is maddening. It’s not easy for people to find you in the dark. We would have watched the show from the roof of a building, but we couldn’t coordinate ourselves with those who offered and the hopes of finding those who were lost.
After the fireworks, we did manage to meet some friends, but there was no way we could direct the lost to join us.
And suddenly, it was midnight!
Don’t you know, The Mister and I got to bed and hadda talk?!?

He managed to get up and go to work today, but all I’ve managed to do is write this blog.

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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26 Responses to Get Up and GO!

  1. meANXIETYme says:

    I’m exhausted after just READING the blog. Sheesh.
    And itchy, which is weird. 🙂

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  2. Jewels says:

    I’m tired just reading about all of the ‘get up and going’ you’ve been doing! Omygosh the head lice… what a nightmare! My daughter had it once when she was young, she got it from a neighbor kid who came camping with us. “Psychological terrorists” is exactly right… I will never be the same after going through that. I feel your pain.

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  3. Dan Antion says:

    So funny. I’m sorry, I’m probably laughing at stuff I shouldn’t laugh at but, well I am. “I-can-put-all-my-weight-into-one-paw-and-stab-your-internal-organs arena.” Not only do I know that from our 6 lb tuxedo girl, I know it from 45lbs of Irish Setter who likes to stand on my stomach.

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  4. OMGOSH! Hysterical. I, too, am exhausted just from reading this. And, yeah, I totally get it about the lice thing. Decades ago I used to date a man whose ex-wife would send her daughter to visit every summer. And every summer, she would arrive with lice. Who ended up with the treatment boxes of shampoo, combs and gloves? Yep, yours truly. Laundering the bedding. The whole shebang. Put up with that for four years. What a moron. Me, I mean. Call me slow learner. :-/

    Love the photo of you and the snuggle-pup. 😉

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    • Oh wow. You’re a better person than I. I would be like, “Nope, not my kid, not my lice!” LOL It’s a lot of work, not to mention the ew factor! What kinda mamas let their babies walk around with bugs in their hair?!? I can’t even think sit still with a few mosquito bites!
      Glad you’re not “there” anymore!

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  5. Deborah says:

    Fountain coke and pretzels for breakfast! Why didn’t I think of that? I hope things calm down a little bit now. Wow, what a handful!

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  6. cardamone5 says:

    Oh, lice and fleas (can I just say I am glad we are cyber friends…I presume?!.) I do not envy you having to deal with either of those pests, or all of the other things impeding your rest (swollen glands and broken tooth…ugh.) However, it sounds like you retained your good humor, which I appreciate, and enjoyed yourself despite the hurdles.

    Wishing you a lice and flea-free rest of the Summer,
    Elizabeth

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  7. words4jp says:

    yes, i am itchy and exhausted you wore me out;) Try to get a little break – soon – maybe????? Of course, the exciting adventures of the creatures (two legged and four legged) in your house provide quote a bit of excitement and humor;) I cannot wait to read what happens next…..I hope it ain’t poison ivy cuz this post has made me pretty darn itchy:)

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  8. Kat's Den says:

    No wonder you’re run down!! Whew!

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  9. meg68 says:

    I go into some kind of coma when the kids bring the nits home.. I get the job done, but I just can’t stand that feeling and my head itches constantly.
    Fitty is hysterical (mostly bald), and asks me to check his head out too. Piss myself laughing –
    “Fitty! They have nowhere to hide!”

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  10. Miss Lou says:

    Bwahahaha! Love it all and am now scratching my head! –

    ‘Moo brought home some head lice, which rapidly formed a metropolis on her head. Moo’s head is pretty small, and the lice were forced to expand into the suburbs of other heads in the house.’ –

    ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
    THAT IS THE BEST (and most amusing) explanation I have ever heard for the way Nits take over households of people!.. lol *almost peeing myself laughing*

    I need to read back to catch up on how you got to this point (I’m always behind).

    I can’t wait until I get old, so then I’ll be wise too. I kill all my plants, so I wont need to worry about whether they are desirable and undesirable ones.

    Wait. maybe I will, since I buy plastic ones.

    I love mulberries, I wish they would accidentally start growing in our garden. Yanno, sometimes I have a conspiracy theory that the seed makers put 3 or 4 different seeds into a packet of seeds. So say – you purchase tomato seeds and in they pop a carrot or watermelon seed. This means you have start all over again OR you are so pleased with the watermelon that grew on top of all your tomatoes that you go and buy more of them – It’s a way of them Cross-Marketing.

    Ouch @ the tooth and hope you don’t get squirts from the antibiotics!

    We celebrated Territory Day here on July 1. There were lots of firecrackers, though no one put one in their bum this year (that I am aware of)

    Great post! I’m still laughing so hard I’m crying.

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    • Thanks, Miss Lou! Well, we aren’t talkin about a beautiful tasty mulberry, we’re talkin about white mulberry, which is toxic to humans, so…..

      And I dunno, maybe you’re onto something with the whole secretly slippin me seeds bit…I had plots picked out for squash, dammit!

      My lymph nodes are much better, so I’m very pleased about the antibiotics, EVEN if I get the squirts. Imagine running a nit comb over sore lymph nodes! My head is bug-free so far, so good!

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