One-Liner Wednesday — And a shelly is a baby what?

My given name is hard for the multitudes to pronounce, and my last name is hopeless, so when I must give a name for an order, I say, “Joey.”

No, Jo is not acceptable. I will not respond to Jo. You can test it at your own peril.

Joey is sometimes still too hard for people, so they often say back, “Joy?” “Joni?” Then I say, “Jo-EEE, like a baby kangaroo?”

Which is why I was alarmed yesterday, when the woman handing me my drink said, “Decaf caramel macchiato for Shelly.”

Well, that’s new.

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One-Liner Wednesday is brought to you by LindaGHill

About joey

Neurotic Bitch, Mother, Wife, Writer, Word Whore, Foodie and General Go-To-Girl
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96 Responses to One-Liner Wednesday — And a shelly is a baby what?

  1. ghostmmnc says:

    And Shelly sure sounds a lot like Joey…haha! Our last name gets all kinds of twists. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Alice says:

    People struggle with your first name?? Can’t you just tell ’em you’re the woman who coulda stolen away Dolly Parton’s gentleman friend?!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Wow, she wasn’t even close. Next time just make up something, like “Eyecandy.”

    Liked by 3 people

  4. rgemom says:

    My name isn’t super common (Donna), but I have never, ever in my life had it totally messed up…until I was in Florida in January. The barista spelled it DAWNA on my cup. What the? We laughed about it for days. For the record, I have ZERO accent so I don’t even get how she heard it that way. Shelly…hah!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. She must know a Shelly and was thinking about her at the time. Yeah, we’ll give her that. My name is often mispronounced as well, but fortunately most of the people who know me as Manee’ do not actually utter it in my presence.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Dan Antion says:

    Don’t feel too bad, Shelly. I have been asked to spell ‘Dan’ and I have had to answer to ‘Pat’ to pick up my order. If the clerk was old enough to remember Airplane, you could have said “and don’t call me Shirley” but if she was 18, you might have gotten a dumb look.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Josh Wrenn says:

    Maybe the barista owned a baby kangaroo named Shelly?

    Liked by 3 people

  8. jan says:

    I used to work for a Dutch company and everyone who hadn’t met me assumed I was a guy. Jan (pronounced Yawn) is a popular guy’s name in Europe.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. HaHA! Some people! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  10. My husband has finally mastered my name. That’s enough.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Benson says:

    I still get people that want to call me Vincent, and I try my best to enunciate clearly. So I can relate.

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      Vincent, eh? Okay. Well, that’s odd, but definitely possible if one doesn’t hear too well. I prefer Benson. Benson is a great name πŸ˜€

      Liked by 1 person

      • Benson says:

        Thank you. You don’t hear it as a first name too often. Many years ago my first wife worked evenings at a fancy infant clothing store. One of her customers was in with her mother to buy clothes for Baby Benson. Cut to the chase the new momma was the sister of a girl I dated in high school. She thought I was so nice she named her first born after me. Of course the ex never got her name. Wierd.

        Liked by 1 person

        • joey says:

          Now I want to know if your first wife worked in the cute little ‘dollhouse’ type shop on 82nd St, because my grandmother did.
          That IS odd. But I tell ya, Benson is a fine name, and you’re a great guy. You probably make all the other Bensons look better πŸ™‚

          Liked by 1 person

  12. Ally Bean says:

    I do not respond to Al. My name is Ally. No one has ever called me Shelly, but I do get Sally once in a while. I dunno about people…

    Liked by 1 person

  13. bikerchick57 says:

    I didn’t realize how hard it was for people to understand and say Joey. It’s just like Mary…we have an extra EE sound at the end. It’s not that hard to pronounce. I wonder what the “Shelley” woman would have yelled out if Benedict Cumberbatch walked in for a caramel latte.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Well, Shelly–I hope you enjoyed your decaf caramel macchiato. πŸ˜‰ My names (Tonya Rieley Hengerer) are constantly mangled, too. I understand. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I’ve been called Janice more times than I care to remember, the most memorable of which was one of my softball coaches. You’d think he would have remembered my name, but no! At least you got your drink…or is there a Shelly still waiting there???

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      There was not a Shelly in sight!
      Janice, hm? I’d think coaches would be better than most, yes, I do. Should be, I suppose.

      Like

  16. orbthefirst says:

    Had to sign mine out today for a stand in nurse cuz she couldnt get that damn “B” out of her mouth. Even the student nurse corrected her.
    Then come to find out that their “cute nickname” for me is Bob Squared. Witty. NOT. πŸ˜›

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Sorry, just had to do it. Forgive me, PLEASE.

    Like

  18. Well…both names end in “y”…it could happen ??? I always give fake names at restaurants, not sure when it started. Sometimes, I like to use “Dufresne, party of 2” old Mitch Hedburg reference. ☺☺

    Liked by 1 person

  19. This makes me feel better. I’ve been called so many strange names…
    Now I usually say, “Eve.” But most people think it’s Eva.
    Don’t ask me, Shelly.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. loisajay says:

    No one knows how to spell LOIS. I get Louis, Louise…once even Rose. But Joey…..unreal. Truly, unreal.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. John Holton says:

    It’s like a game with them, to see who comes up with the most outrageous name. Either that, or they’re deaf from listening to noisy hip-hop at full volume through earbuds.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Ellen Hawley says:

    Joey, Shelley, Constance, Abigail. Anyone could confuse them.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. pluviolover says:

    Only Joey could get 65 responses to this, while Shelley is waiting for his drink. My friend, Jolene hates her name, the song, and gives “that look” to cashiers who ask her not to take their man.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Anxious Mom says:

    Hahahaha! My friend got a totally random name on her coffee once, one that didn’t sound a thing like her name. I think they like to screw with people.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. My daughter had a friend from church named Jolene. She was Jolene not Jo, or Joey. Jolene. I have no problem calling her Jolene, and I never, not once sang to her that song.

    My name is Deborah. I introduce myself as Deborah and yet there’s always someone who decides I must be called Debbie. Like you it’s not me or my name. I don’t answer to it when called.
    I also don’t answer to “MOM” when in crowded places. Too many years spent at baseball and softball games with too many kids with yelling Mom! around so I tuned out sometime when my son was in Little League.
    My daughter now grown up was playing in Bobby Sox and was calling me from the dugout; I never heard it. After yelling Mom for 5 minutes she was totally frustrated and belted out “WOMAN!” I turned to look. Since that moment she’s calls me “Woman” when out in a crowded place and needs to call out for my attention. I always answer. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      HAHA! Once, I was in a hobby store with my MIL and I called out “Mom!” and about ten women turned to look at me! So I know now.

      I can appreciate you being Deborah. I fail to understand why anyone would think they know our names better than we do.
      On behalf of all Jolenes, thank you for not singing the song πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  26. I, personally, thought the name Jolene was pretty when I heard that song. But I would get annoyed if people thought it was funny to refer to the negative connotations of song every time they heard my name!
    My husband just recently figured out the song “Amie” by Pure Prairie League was about the woman being with somebody else and him wanting her back. lol.
    I don’t think anyone’s ever gotten my name wrong, maybe misspelled it.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. You’d think Sunny would be easy, but I get Suni scrawled on my cup an awful lot. With the GOT craze, I started throwing out my last name Lanning and, sure enough, it is hilarious to hear the room go quiet when an order for “Lannister” is called out. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  28. DanicaPiche says:

    Haha πŸ™‚ Well, as long as they got your drink right! I usually give names like Michelle or Angela…. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  29. Joanne Sisco says:

    I related to your comment about Jo names. I was really sensitive about it when I was younger, but now – not so much.

    Because my name isn’t hyphenated or 2 separate words, more often than not I get Joan-ee. It used to make me insane… now I just sigh.
    My husband, years ago with his french accent, pronounced it Jowin – especially when he was talking quickly. I actually really miss it πŸ™‚
    I will respond to Jo, but interestingly very few people actually do … and no one – ever – has called me Joey. I guess I just don’t look like a Joey πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  30. marianallen says:

    I decided not to go into Library Science because I get, “Marian, Madam Librarian” quite enough, as it is. Oh, and my youngest stepdaughter, who met me when she was seven, told me, “I’m gonna call you Mary Ann, because I can’t say Marian.” Crazy li’l bird! Then she proceeded to call me Mar (as in mare). She had the first grandchild, so all my grandchildren call me Grandmar. Everybody thinks they’re bilingual. Ha!

    Liked by 1 person

    • joey says:

      Haha! Marian is super easy, for pity’s sake. Grandmar is pretty cute though! πŸ™‚

      Like

      • marianallen says:

        I get called Mary Ann, Miriam, Marium — I even had a guy call me at my dorm room and start talking to me in Persian; they had misspelled my name in the campus directory as Marina, and he thought I was somebody from home.

        Liked by 1 person

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