I always joke that my driver’s license makes me look like one of the peoples from Wall-e. You remember the chair-bound peoples? Yeah, in my license photo, my face is round and huge and peachy and my hair is straight. We’re not allowed to smile at the BMV now, so I’m basically featureless. The Mister’s photo is equally bad. Looking at our licenses side-by-side, it’s amazing those two people found one another and did not make babies with giant peach heads and beady lil eyes.
But you know those moments when you turn on your phone and you’re like — well, like me last night — one big blue blob of sweater like someone didn’t case the pillow right? Lumps of generous curves. Loose breasts and a mother’s apron plopped onto the sofa like a stack of ice cream scoops. Pointy chin shining like the star of the show, and a tiny little peachy head with two dark dots for eyes teetering there in the hammock that is your ginormous second chin — well I’m not going to show you. In reality, I’d show you, Gentle Reader, but it’s the silent unknown readers who will have to imagine my blobbiness.
I am feeling all my blobbiness. Blah. Blahbbiness.
I am feeling very time-for-noodles, time-for-thick-ugly-socks, time-for-quilts. Mmhm.
The weekend is upon us. First, we must coffee and workee. Then we must come home, don fleece and ugly socks, and we should probably make breakfast for dinner. Eggs and toast and jam. Yes, this is what we need. With chocolate milk. Doesn’t that sound good? Fine, I’ll fry you some bacon. Then we will puter and music til we cannot brain and go to bed and make snuggles and sleep. At least, I will, because The Mister is the default morning parent and I am so lucky I married the early bird and he tosses me worms when I wake up.
I have the late afternoon shift and thus I will donate a few hours of my time to good works at school (which will also count as cardio) and then I will go back home and do pleasing things.
Like lie in my bed and sit on my sofa. Like Wall-e peoples. I might read. I might write. I might binge watch tv and pick mats out of Clara’s fur. I live large, y’all.
I lived large last weekend and that’s how I got all blahbby.
How are you feeling? What will you do this weekend?
Happy Friday Everyone!
